ruminate, ruminate, ruminate....

 my brain does like to ruminate, but more on that later.  first happier things.  blossom. she is such a cutie.  rio joined us these past few days on walks.  i needed her nose today to help me feel safe in the woods.  she's pretty good at alerting me to wild animals and  i was out there alone today.  another gorgeous day though.

today i walked out gasline to powerline to tank trail.

 yesterday was monday walk.  amy, karen and lena joined me this week so i wasn't alone.  no signs of bears seen these past few days though, which is always good.  i have seen bear tracks in the fresh snow this time of year before.  they are still out there.  made lots of noise today.  talking to dogs, banging the chuck it on the leash.  i probably sound like a crazy person out there.

 lots of ice out there, layers of it at the creeks.  not sure any of my pictures do it justice.  fun trying though.

 amy and sydney out again.  not sure sydney was all that thrilled, but she did great really!!

 blossom is taking every opportunity to get to the water before it gets totally frozen over.  of course, this means i will be avoiding large bodies of water for a bit.  can't really trust blossom on lakes this time of year.  would hate to have her fall through thin ice.

 sydney gets a meet and greet with the dogs.  i think they look less scary above.  they are a rather large lot.

 the ice is always doing interesting stuff this time of year.

 found some decent pumpkins at carrs yesterday.  ran a few errands.  haven't gotten these guys carved yet.

 also bought a few small pumpkins for my adorable mr potato head pumpkin kits.  they really did turn out cute.  also got the lights hung on the front.

 looks a bit halloweeny around here.

 there is the front deck. of course i'm actually working halloween night so hopefully nobody will be mean to my pumpkins that night.

 some pumpkins i've seen around town looked pretty crappy, these guys look good though.  i would like to make some bread with the guts from the bigger pumpkins.

 my day today...well i had my ultrasound done on my leg.  i for sure have venous insufficiency of the veins.  lots of sloshing around. not good.  the cellulitis was really thrombophlebitis.  looks like it's pretty much shut that vein down at this point.  the superficial saphenous way up is supposed to be like 5mm wide and mine was 12 mm so something will have to be done.  my other leg has issues as well, but isn't causing me issues at this time.  i think i'll feel better just getting one leg done first to see how that goes.  i'm sure the other leg will need work as well.

 felt pretty anxious about the whole thing, working in medicine you see and think the worst possible scenario's...stroke, clots, anuerysms...

 to fix they will run a tube up my vein and then just fry it shut.  scary...seems like such a major vein, but then he did remind me that for all those heart patients they have utilized that vein for years and nobody misses it.  of course, if my vein is crap it will be of no use to me in an open heart surgery.  that did make me feel better realizing people exist without them.  would be great if that could fix the issues.  have to get compression stockings, at least thigh highs and wear those for 3 months before the insurance companies will allow the proceedure to be done.  so  i'll have to get those tomorrow.

 getting old and having parts of your body wear out is really annoying.  it's what it is.  hopefully, all will go well with this and i will be good for many more miles.  i have a few months to dwell on it.  3 months is followup, then wait for insurance approval and then the proceedure.  they do it in the office and supposedly, you are back to baseline within a few days.  may try and take a few days off and plan it for my 6 day stretch off.

 if they thought i was in grave danger they would have sent me to the emergency department.  wonder what they would have done if they'd seen me when this first showed up.  it was probably the flights that got me.  luckily it happened coming home and not out there on round island.

 of course, my brain is playing games with me tonight.  am i short of breath, could it be a pulmonary emboli, is that abdomen pain, could that be an aneurysm....it's easy to get crazy on this sort of stuff.  i want my mommy!!

 went to the pool after the ultrasound.  always good to get some laps in.  have been just sticking to 20 laps, like a half hour.  good enough for a nice workout.

 tried working on the book, but wasn't really focused.  watched mindless television and didn't pay the stepper for it.  should just open a bottle of wine and force my brain to relax.  the fire is going in the fireplace and a glass of wine...could be the answer!  nothing i can do really at the moment to change the facts.

 read some really interesting stuff in the latest national geographic...still an amazing magaine.

 first they had this whole thing on cuba post fidel castro.  such a strange place. i guess there are two currencies at this time.  the people are paid in peso's, but if they want to buy anything they have to use the other currency, cuc's. the peso is worth 1/24th of the cuc.  crazy..so nothing really.  those are used for tourists.  the peso amount they get paid is crap and the cuc's are spendy.  highly educated people are working as taxi drivers as they make little to no money otherwise. all these tricks and schemes to get those cuc's.  many come from relatives in the states.  things are changing, but just kinda crazy overall.

 must be incredibly frustrating but it's also amazing how humans adapt to these strange circumstances and find their way around the obstacles.

 i remember being at the sealife center not too long ago and watching the puffins swim under water, when they darted about all these air bubbles released from them.  tanya and i thought it was strange.  then i am looking at another article in this months nat geo and it's talking about emperor penguins in antarctica and how they release these air bubbles as they propel themselves through the water.  must be similar thing to what i saw with the puffins.the penguins release bursts of tiny air bubbles for short bursts of speed. apparently the air bubbles somehow this cuts drag is said and allows for those bursts of speed.  strange.

 a great issue. cool photos by a photographer that uses a motorized paraglider to soar over sand dunes and capture those.  pretty amazing.

 lots of frost out there today.  patches of it anyway.  the gasline trail down actually had some pretty big patches of ice.  cleats would have been helpful.

 creeks meander down through that area.  cool to look at.

 i'm a bit off kilter sleep wise this week. have been going to bed earlier and then waking earlier as well.  not sure what to make of that. throws off my rhythm.

 occurred to me that i could catch my niece claire at home for a chat today.  got lucky so we chatted a bit.  has been awhile.  always fun to catch up.

 blossom makes her way across the ice.  she was much quicker about it than rio and i were.  poor rio. i've really worked her this week.

 some days you want to talk and it seems nobody wants to listen.  seems like everyone wants to talk, you get  used to listening and can't find a way to be heard anymore. all you can do is listen. guess that is why i miss mom on days like this.  she listened when nobody else would, she was actually interested in what i had to say.  for most people whatever you say just reminds them of the next thing they want to say.  so you never really get heard.  sometimes i talk, but it's just not loud enough and it's not noticed. maybe it's heard, but not at all interesting so it's ignored.

 errands to do tomorrow.  gotta get those support hose.  we shall see how that goes.  at least it's winter and it will be an extra layer.  could get hot, especially at work.  maybe i'll lose weight.  it will be like a girdle so all my jiggly bits will not longer have the ability to jiggle.  i've worn support hose, but they are only knee high and not as tough as what i should be wearing.  oh joy! hate putting those on patients, i know they will help though.

 see more ruminating.

 empty seed pods.

 more crystals.

 i was surprised that blossom never lost her toy today. she kept dropping it in the creek.  at least this one didn't have a hole in it.  yesterdays ball was lost to the ice.  the current drags it under.  of course, that happens to people too.  we lost one lady to a local creek last year, just that way. so sad.  she got trapped under the ice in not so deep water really, the current took her under. how horrible. some stories just haunt you.

 pretty ice formation..water in all forms is lethal though at times, best to always be careful around water.

well, i guess i shall take my ruminating brain to bed and hope it gets relief.