forced wellness...

time has come to head back to work and give wellness a try. i know i'll be sleepy and i'm still coughing but i have dog food to buy, a morgage to pay and more dog food to buy. i can't let that face go hungry. they will miss me terribly. it seems like ages since i've been at work. so strange. they called tonight, but i think my usual 4 day stretch will already be pushing my body. i'm better though. the bronchitis is just that and you get used to living with some things. i think most people do at some point. well either you get used to a certain amount of aches and health issues as you age or you let them roll you over. when my body needs extra support, i try to give in to the body's demands. my lungs were at thier healthiest after i'd lived in south dakota for 6 months. i remember i was at work and a secretary made the comment that i had finally stopped coughing. when i lived in los angeles i never stopped coughing. in south dakota i totally stopped and in alaska it's now a once or twice a year thing. so i have times where i don't really cough at all. i know it sounds nuts coming from one living in alaska, but it's too cold in south dakota so i'll stay here. winters are much longer here i know, but the wind in south dakota goes right through to your bones and you really can't enjoy winter like you can here. not sure how a place further north would compare, like fairbanks, but anchorage is very livable.
rio above obviously. she joined us for a nice walk of rovers run to moose meadow. i was actually awake at a decent hour, but then got sleepy after my morning cough routine and the grey skies probably didn't help. i started reading and then fell asleep again. the girls and i didn't get on the trail til after 2pm. it was another "warm" day out there. warm is relative i know. i was able to finally get my shovel out of the driveway. it was frozen in due to roof melt in these warm temperatures. i tried the kettle and hot water, but today i found just pulling really hard did the trick. a glove is salvaged. no wild animal sightings besides birds today. i again removed snow from the bird feeders and refilled them. not sure what other people do in the winter. put feeders under eaves so they don't fill with snow perhaps? anyway, the birds must have been watching as they made a run at that feeder pretty fast. i'm sure my resident squirrel will be thrilled as well. supposed to get more snow over the next few days.i think blossom enjoyed her day of frisbee chasing. no interruptions from large alaskan malemutes. not that she doesn't enjoy other dogs, but she is part retriever and she needs her fetch times.a woman took her life in dec. she stopped eating because she decided life as a quad was no longer bearable or tolerable. they had a link to her blog where she had written about her life as a quad and about quality vs quantity of life issues. i can totally understand why she did what she did. always sad though. life can change in an instant. for her it was a swimming accident. she was in her mid twenties when it happened. i think it would become intolerable to live completely dependant on others. she talked about the day to day embarrassments and the total lack of any privacy in life as a quad. i believe her writings will come out in book form at some point. sounds like that was her intention. education. my heart goes out to her and her loved ones. medicine now puts people in situations where these decisions become necessary and are made even more difficult by others who would judge her and disallow her the right to die with dignity. my career does put me in the position to see these life altering events up close and personal. often being at the bedside i can see the future where families can't or won't. when your loved one is in a hospital you are usually just hoping they survive and it's hard to look past that gut emotional response and make decisions. who wants to cut off the life of a loved one, we put people in impossible positions and expect rational decisions. it's insane and cruel.blossom looks all chill here. she was rolling in the snow. such a happy dog. isn't she adorable!?! watched a net flix rental last night, "it's kinda a funny story". a teen is totally stressed with life, overwhelmed and feeling suicidal. his parents don't seem to be taking him seriously. he gets himself admitted to a psych ward, the teen unit is closed and he's put in with more serious, long term adult patients. it is kinda a funny story. not the best movie, but interesting. at some point you have to just look a your parents and thank them for raising you, but you will now be living life the way you choose. i think most people overestimate their parents negative response to this. i'm sure in some ways my parents were disappointed in my choices, but i think also they eventually respected me for living my life my way. well, this should be it for a few days. hopefully, i muddle through my stretch of work and continue to improve. time for the nearly healthy to get living again. also time for the still very sleepy to get to bed.