Fur Rondy time...

 

last stretch with 3 shifts in a row, hopefully anyway. i suppose it could happen again. i'm officially .6 part time so 2 shifts/week required. will be great.  i'm just slowly backing out of the current job.  hoping this makes things much better. if not...then it will just push me closer to straight up retiring. it is nice to have the option really. 

had my evaluation this last week.  i'm average...at least that is how the upper management would see me according to my files. i'm sure they prefer all their employees to be average..then it makes it easier for them to ditch us anytime they want. 

when i first became a nurse i bought in to all the fluff about us being professionals.  we are blue collar workers.  we clock in and out and our time all must be accounted for. i have loved working 12 hour shifts for years.  in that whole life/work balance thing, i have been way ahead. overall it's been a good career.  able to take care of myself. met great people and every 12 hours you do seem to manage to make some ones life a little better. happy i wasn't some corporate drone, lost in the money loop.  more money just leads to more trouble in many cases. not that any of us wouldn't always love more money...it's just that it's not all it's cracked up to be.  

simplicity is probably a more manageable, fulfilling life. it works for me.  my work can be frustrating, especially if i think of the big picture..and post covid i have thought more of how little we are respected by administration.  that is frustrating to me. we should have gotten more recognition and appreciation for what we did for our community and for our hospital. that will never happen though. 

you can only dwell on those things for so long until you just know you have to let it go. 

it's what we do for each other and what we do for our patients that counts.  it's part of why i have stayed on nights.  cuts the bull and at night you are just a crew of people taking care of sick and injured as a team.  days...it's just too many reminders of how little you are valued by admin.  luckily, i have a pretty nice middle management team...the other reason i have stayed.  i'm really not that difficult to please in many ways. i work to live not live to work...

i'm sure on the outside, my life is pretty basic, but that has been a very great life. 

suspect covid pushed us all farther faster toward burn out. many of the younger nurses are already in burn out mode. with aging i find it's easy to imagine yourself having all sorts of medical issues. i can imagine myself into a frenzy.  overall, i'm doing pretty well for the age i am compared to many and probably not as well compared to others. 

got my echocardiogram. just mild leaking in a few valves. of course, this sort of caused me some stress and anxiety.  you want there to be nothing wrong with you but that isn't how aging works. we are all classic cars at a certain point. in need of special care and constant attention. 

last week i worked ER-Renal Care-ER.  i got to escape an hour or two early for both of those ER nights. got to walk a dog one night.  made me want to work with dogs and cats again...maybe i'll look for a vet tech/front office gig at a clinic. even just for a bit for a break from what i do. 

this week was PCU-ICU.  i was cranky last night in ICU just because they gave me the triple but it always feels like they just downgrade too fast sometimes. in the end it wasn't a bad night. i got over whining. 

the fur rondy is in full swing.  i worked through the dog sprint races but have hit a few of my favorite events.  the snow sculptures were up so i headed down town Sunday.  there are some good ones. my most favorite this year depicted the salmon life cycle.  very detailed, impressive. 

today i headed over to the Dimond Mall where natives gather with their arts and crafts for sale.  always just some amazing stuff.  ended up buying a few pairs of earrings and a painted piece of baleen. it was a little pricey but i was able to barter her down a bit so that helped. i have a few things to hang up on the walls so perhaps i'll do a bit of that tomorrow. today was bills and litter and stuff

changed out the back seat dog cover. the other one had gotten worn out over these past few years.  it was time. there was a hole in it and worried Ivy would fall through the hole. 

this pretty puppy below had her 8th Birthday last week. i am aware that dogs are not aware of their Birthdays but i still like to make it special. it's still a little tough each year knowing Tusker isn't here to celebrate with us.  i got her some toys treats and then we had a great walk followed by pool time.  was able to get Ivy Rose pool time on her special day.  we attempted to convince Sunny Boy to swim but he wasn't interested. he had a great time running around the pool and wading in to steal Ivy's tennis ball as soon as she came out of the water.  both dogs were exhausted that evening. 

otherwise just the usual walks and activities that happen in my life. there are a few books on my reading list so perhaps i can get some chill reading time in.  

this weekend is Iditarod.  the winter seems to speed up as these events happen and the light lengthens. 

still need to book some time in Homer. looks like a good low tide coming up in April. always need escapes to look forward to. we also have Tonsina cabin lined up for late April

other than the internal drama my brain puts me through life has been pretty calm.  

i mean there is the usual drama of politics and all that but there really isn't much i can do. people are going to have to make their own choices and live with the consequences. i'm disturbed by it all and by the support that this idiot still garnishes.  these fools just keep sending him money. as they say a fool and their money...

we should be lined up for our event at REI. always scary planning public events. 

i made some little flyers and put some up at the hospital in a few units. i also took one down to REI for them to put up.  need to look on their web page and see what they put in there...maybe send them a few photos to add in to their listings for our lecture. with covid, the crew at REI and Fish and Game have both changed up. so that makes it a bit more stressful. 

these are of our night at Orca Island.  a little spendy but worth it i think.  still not a place i will head to over and over. so happy i had a willing guest so i could go check it out.  so fun and so beautiful.

below is not Orca Island as it rained the full 24 hours we were there. 

we shall see what this summer brings. hopefully, lots of our door time. i will need to repair the little free library.  it's not surviving the winter.  the main box is okay but it's falling off the post. 

the Skelly's are falling apart as well. may put them out with free signs at some point and replace them.  got them into St Patricks Day attire tonight. 

this bridge out at Orca Island is so picturesque. if i was out there more i would just take photo after photo with different light/tides. i imagine sunset/sunrise shots as well. 

as the light returns i feel more like getting out further from my home base.  

we will have a late spring again this next year as we have so much snow to melt.  it is always surprising how fast this place changes up. i should start more intense spring cleaning projects.  i also really should get some projects going at the house. 

these memories from this summer trip will for sure last a life time. 

me and the sisters. Homer. these must be the wonderful photos that were taken by SH.  she is an amazing photographer.  i suspect like me, she is often more comfortable behind the camera than in front of the camera. it was such a perfect group, all 6 of us. reminds me of the Chilkoot hike...just the perfect group to be traveling with.  so much positive energy and support. 

and back to Orca Island. we saw a humpback while we were out there, no orca's. 

the yurts were very comfortable. 

mushrooms!!

below is a nice shot of those kayak holders that you slide the kayak into. not as stable as i assumed and i looked like an old lady trying to get myself out of the boat.  pretty embarrassing actually. haha. 

a stop to enjoy the lupine 

sunset at Bishops Beach

more from the Matanuska Glacier tour.  another treat 

lost my internet for a bit last night. thankfully,  this draft, though incomplete remains.  so it's just like when you are on the phone talking away but the connection was lost and you are speaking to nobody. 

not sure of my plans yet today.  it's 3 degrees out there and the tide is going out so perhaps a little beach walk will happen. 

the other day there was a tiktok, a girl dressed head to toe in Maga crap.  she was talking about swifties not knowing they were in a cult.  i suspect that she was being ironic and wasn't a maga rat at all. i was laughing though. i'd much rather join a happy, loving, hugging, singing, dancing, bracelet sharing cult than the cult of hatred, division, guns, rights removal and an orange turd leader. sign me up. 

Swift finished in Australia and now heads to Singapore next.  that place is already decked out and prepped for their Swift invasion.  special added trains just to get to and from the show.  selfie ops through out. not sure how she ever tops what she has done this past year, career wise. she is sure taking advantage of this moment she is having. i don't think she will go quietly into the night after this though.  some stars remain relevant their entire lives...folks like Dolly and Betty White. for some their talent isn't really appreciated for decades. i always say artists are unique and unlike most of us, they aren't quite as replaceable as we are. 

i am now the oldest, aside from some Dr's, when i work.  most nurses have left the bedside entirely by this age or have moved to days.  no idea how old M in ICu is or EP in ER..older than me and still kicking butt as nurses.  many of the younger ones are ready to book after a year or two. no idea how these places are going to keep staff once the old guard leaves. right now it feels like constant turn over.  was talking with my younger co-workers the other night. it often comes up...they want to know what things are different from when i started...i also mentioned how one day they will be thinking about all the things that have changed since they entered nursing. it is another thing many of us like in medicine.  

of course, all this immigration bashing, can only be bad for this profession.  when i look around, i know these hospitals would fail completely without staff at all levels that have come from elsewhere. stats say that the vast number of advanced degrees being earned in our nations universities are from other countries.  those people are bringing to much to our nation and this negativity and hatred will drive the brain power out of this nation and take it to others. it's not just brain power though.  workers at all levels are needed. the drug addicts and alcoholics i see on a regular basis...i gotta say, they are not first or second generation immigrants. just saying. with out immigration in all forms...our nation fails. 

better get the day going.  shower, walk, hang photos...

thankful for A. shorter work weeks. B. dogs, they are just so amazing. C. the artistic gifts all around us. 

the days are getting longer, lovely warm weather...! 30's

 

i'm really behind now in these blog posts.  it's okay. that generally means my brain is calm. calm is good.  

these are still from July last summer with my nieces.  Matanuska glacier, Orca Island, walk to Gwenich Glacier. it was a real Alaskan holiday. 

this lake, like all others, is frozen.  we have had warmer weather.  it started the day after we paid to have the roof shoveled off. that is how it goes. today the road crew came and widened the street, hauling off tons of snow. it was mostly a one lane road. this has happened so many times this winter.  neighbors are great at taking turns passing.

we are all enjoying these warm temperatures though. 20's-40's F. 

i thought i'd get at least 24 hours notice on the roof crew.  instead i found out they were coming just as i was leaving for work.  ended up in the ER. it was such a crazy and strange night. we started with 23 holds, people just kept getting rooms but the waiting room was packed. oddly, the place cleared out and by around 4 am we only had like 5 holds left? anyway.  i got to come home early.  so between 5am and 6 am i was charging up the Element and digging it out. had to have the cars out of the driveway.  

sleeping was impossible. i slept a few hours before the crew was supposed to arrive.  woke up as the dogs were not going to just allow a crew to walk around the roof and not let everyone know about it.  they finished by afternoon.  i think i slept another hour or two. then went outside to try and make it so i could put both cars side by side again.  no go.  too much snow.  got cars back in the driveway though. Element battery is dead again.  oh well. 

at that time i also discovered that so much snow had been shoveled in to my side yard that i had two dogs looking down at me from over the fence.  i started to dig a moat and lower the level of snow on the other side of the fence. i needed to get ready for work so i had decided i'd just shut the dog door rather than risk having the dogs escape. 

i think for maybe the first time i called work and requested an on call. some request on calls all the time.  i just take them when they come my way, which is not usually very often.  glory...they gave me one and again the next night.  lots of digging and no call back either night. i was sore from the digging anyway by the next night. 

my next week was a split of peds/picu and icu. not bad nights...i mean other than one small patient attempting to code at one point. i was quite happy to switch assignments at 1 am and hand that kid off.  the kid did get worse again the next day so happy to have missed that. 

haven't worked ICU for some time and i got to do a road trip to the MRI...currently outside the facility in a trailer.  a bit tricky with ICU patients. at least it was warmer than last time i had to go out there.  remove all metal and then put a coat and hat on...it was well below zero last time. i think the noises have kept the moose away...but in truth you could have a moose cruise through as you are trying to load a patient into the trailer. there is a lift outside for stretcher patients. a bit crazy.  we still have months to go before the new MRI facility is all up and running. 

getting my walks in mostly. good with the step counts.  mentally doing pretty well.  minimal anxiety.  no real need for prn's of late. just taking the magnesium and so far it seems to be helping. 

dogs had to put up with mildly cranky me today.  not sure why...just woke on the wrong side of the bed i guess. think we all have those days. we all took two walks.  Sunny Boy had a vet appointment.  got medicine in his ears.  hope it's not toxic since i had to keep stopping Ivy Rose from cleaning his ears. he was a hit at the Vets.  he charmed them all and got loads of compliments.  he really is a great puppy. 

we hit the dog park first. did a nice run out there.  a few moose. one sleeping on the lake, easy to avoid and another surprise one back in the woods. Sunny did make a run over to meet the moose.  thankfully, he returned after i called "leave it" and "here puppy".  whew!

after the Vet appointment we headed to Ruth Arcand.  the rocks are starting to show up again.  i'd cared for a patient that i know i've met out there so i was kind of avoiding the area for a bit for the patients comfort.  eventually, we may run into each other. it's a pretty small state human wise for how big it is. 

i had forgotten to grab any rocks but i had a pretty snail shell in the car so i exchanged a rock for that and then that gave me a rock to trade with.  came home with a kitty rock.  :-) always love a kitty rock. we didn't see the patient, any moose or horses so a good day. 

the moose have been busy out there.  as winter moves along they appreciate our plowed streets and trails more and more. saves them from having to trudge through the deep stuff.  they are getting tired and cranky though. there was a great video of a woman at the costco i frequent.  she had the trunk open and a few carts filled with goods.  there was a moose that walked up and was "shopping" in her carts.  you can here here talking to the moose, requesting he leave...promising him some food if he leaves and then scolding him for putting his ears down...a sign of irritation in moose. 

Super Bowl sunday has come and gone.  i watched the puppy bowl for a bit before heading out.  there seemed to be a lot of drama.  the conservatives are angry with Taylor Swift for encouraging her fans to sign up to vote. they are also mad because her latest boyfriend was playing in the super bowl and her going to games has been difficult for the right to deal with.  that makes me happy...haha. the boyfriend bought her and his/her families a box...cost of a million for one game.  the cheapest seats for the game are apparently $10,000 each seat. omg...that is just insane to me. 

so much drama about her being there at all. guess she's brought new fans and more money to the sport so the right should just shut up but they hate everything and everyone they are told to hate and faux news is spewing taylor hate at this moment. they just always have some one new to hate or some group to hate. it's all hate with the evangelicals.  they wonder why people are leaving christianity. it's the lack of Christ in Christianity. if Jesus walked in to faux news station they would totally trash him and easily convince all their evangelical viewers to hate him and call him anti christian, or the devil, a communist, a socialist, tree hugger, libtard....you name it. 

got my first look at her new boyfriend through the million tiktoks out there.  seem like a real football player/frat boy.  you never get to have everything in life so she is in love and getting love bombed for sure...he has a bit of a short fuse.  there is a clip of him bumping his over 60 coach and screaming in the guys face to put him in. then right after they win he gets the mike and just starts screaming viva las vegas.  ironic since the girl he's dating is magical with lyrics and all he can do is scream viva las vegas.  

then there is a parade in Kansas City...which is in Missouri not Kansas (like the orange idiot believes). anyway. the boyfriend was totally drunk and sang a garth brooks song.  falling over. i think this was pretty early in the day....then there was a shooting.  the place was swimming in cops but a few bystanders that weren't armed took down one of the shooters.  one dead, i think 20 injured, many kids. thoughts and prayers i'm sure from the right. i guess Missouri has some of the least strict gun laws.  the team did not change their dinner celebration plans after the shooting. seems like a family friendly parade should be a place to tamp down the drunk celebrations but football players i guess are given every excuse to be drunk in public and scream at their coaches.  so many excuses out there.  Taylor had flown off to Australia to perform to more sold our crowds.  she is rocking life right now so she seems happy with her football player.  not sure that guy will be the one but you never know. people and relationships are not that easy to predict, love makes people do unpredictable things. 

it's been lots of swift drama as the grammy's were right before all this and she got the album of the year award.  once again, there was someone who believed the award should go to  Beyonce. years ago i think with one of her first awards, Kanye came up on stage as she was accepting the award and literally grabbed the mike from her and said Beyonce deserved it. this time Beyonce's cheating husband used some random award he was given to just say that she needed to be respected and be giving the award.  i think she already has a crazy number of grammy wins...just hasn't gotten the album of the year. a bunch of rich spoiled fools from my view point.  

whining and carrying on about not getting awards, screaming and getting drunk when they win a game. the rest of us just go in and do our jobs and don't get any big awards or wins.  we just show up day in and day out. get paid much less, scrap by and these wealthy spoiled brats are never satisfied or just act the fools. 

guess that is my rant for the week.  i actually did watch the ERA's tour on Amazon.  the cost was nearly $20.  no crowds though.  so a perfect way to enjoy it.  she did put on a great show and i do like that she gives back...way more than any of these churches do from what i have seen.  she donated $100,000 to the family of the woman lost to gun violence at the parade her boyfriend attended. that was kind of her. 

the politics and election run is bonkers.  as the orange idiot battles to delay all these court cases, he's had a few losses of late. he won't go to the supreme court to argue that he should have total immunity because he was potus. he got fined $355 million+interest i think in the fraud case in NY. he also got fined in the repeat case over smearing the name of the women he raped. 

his friend F-ER Carlson went to Russia and gave put a long platform. put even mocked him. right after that aired. Navolny ( the guy who put jailed for trying to run against him, after the guy survived put poisoning him) he died suddenly in prison in some remote and brutal prison.  he'd actually been in a court room the day before looking pretty good so hmm.  put kills people all the time. they need to send all puts held money to Ukraine. it's sitting in banks in Germany i think.  they also need to pass the damn bill to send money/supplies to Ukraine. it passed the Senate but the new idiot in charge on the house refuses to even vote on things. they just want to waste time trying to impeach people.  their star witness was just found to be lying. of course, they followers are so in the bubble that they never hear any actual news. 

it's just all sorts of insane. you can't possibly keep up. 

as for Israel and Palestine...omg. it's just brutal.  what happened on Oct 7 was horrific...also a lot of the crap happening in Palestine is horrific. it's all just bad. Hamas still has hostages, many of those hostages have now been reported as dead. i think like 30 of them.  the people of Gaza just seem to be pushed from area to area.  none of the surrounding nations want them or hamas. they say it's because those refugees would never be allowed to return...so i guess they are okay with them just being slaughtered as well. that seems fairly telling.  it's a huge disaster that we are sucked in to. of course, biden gets trashed for helping Israel but you better believe the orange fool and his followers would happily drop a nuclear bomb on gaza.  something about the second coming and zion...i don't know.  it's all way too out of my brains ability to comprehend it, but it's all horrific and brutal. death all over. so much hatred out there.  

from my viewpoint all religions cause so much hatred.  ours is better than yours attitude...when all along it's just about money and power. where ever you are born, to whom you are born...that is the religion you mostly stick with. they can't all be right but for sure they can all be wrong. 

should hit the beach tomorrow.  haven't been for a bit.  this is a snow crust heart i made.  

frost...now all melted

i have one more 3 day run then i'm down to 2 shifts/week.  may try to pick up one shift randomly or eventually just find a second job to pick up some hours in a much less stressful environment. wanting less coding kids

i'd rather have less drama in my life and enjoy the drama of others...let them have drama. 

they make more money so they can have the drama that comes with fame and fortune. 

a little tidbit from an old prophets journal.  Wilford Woodruff.  he apparently would have dead single women sealed to him for time and eternity on his Birthday each year.  "single women" could include children who had died. 267 ? total number of brides to be enjoyed in the next life. the upper leadership have been gifted a second annointing so they can do no wrong as their place in heaven is assured before they die...that is the doctrine and practive.  the second annointing stuff is pretty hush hush.  can you imagine gifting yourself with dead wives.  sick perverts is all i can say to that. 

also ran across an interesting quote...lots of truth in it though.  "if your absence doesn't bother them, your presence never meant anything to them". 

bill paying, laundry and dishes...just doing the stuff that always needs to be done. 

i try to always tuck in silly stuff though. 

i should book some homer fun and start to really look at summer stuff. i also want to get some rocks painted.  that is the goals for this stretch off. 

my niece has graciously offered to help get the web page up.  thank you J and S H.  so grateful for the help. 

communicating with my REI and fish and game contacts, make sure we are getting set up for our walrus lecture. didn't see it up at REI so hopefully that goes up soon.  if you live in the area. it's March 19th, 5:30-7:30 pm at REI. they have a lecture room and they allow us to do this at no charge. 

cute shot of Sunny Boy. the dogs are tuckered out.  had a few signs of visits from Rio Catalina (i turned off the tv and went to leave, as i was shutting the door the tv turned back on) also found a tennis ball, which i always view as Blossom stopping by.  not sure what Tusker would do if he visited.  i like to think the dogs stop by. i'd like to discover that after i die a bunch of animals would be there to greet me. saw a cartoon years ago.  it was a guy at the pearly gates. the guy managing the gate tells him if he doesn't mind throwing tennis balls for eternity they had an opening in dog heaven.  i'd take that job for sure.  haha. 

i'm sure i have rambled on tonight, my apologies. 

my brain can't pull up images but it does have a constant dialogue. 

oh, i went to see hockey with the H's. that was fun. haven't been to hockey for ages.  it was super bowl sunday...so instead of hockey i met friends from ketchikan for dinner and then hockey.  the aces are long gone but we enjoyed the local university's team.  we had front row seats. pretty cheap. i think $8 as opposed to the $8,000+ for a super bowl seat. way more fun.  i'm still shocked by that level of spending.  

with Snowzilla and more snow hearts below

i'll crash fairly soon.  

grateful for: warmer temperatures, a plowed road and finding rocks at Ruth Arcand today. always fun.