"good" emotions vs "bad" emotions

 

was thinking the other day about how we were raised to believe that there were good emotions and bad emotions. we were made to believe we needed to suppress all of those bad emotions and only feel good emotions. any bad emotion was a negative reflection of us. such a strange way to screw up people. all emotions are valid. not good or bad. it's really just what you do with your emotion that deems what sort of person you. perhaps this is one of the reasons for all the rage in the right. they have suppressed all those "bad" emotions and they have to be released somewhere.

thought i'd toss in some pictures from a wildlife boat trip out of Seward the other day. i'm trying to have some fun plans for each stretch off. this week it was the train to Spencer Glacier to walk and this boat trip.  the calm seas hit Monday and the weather wasn't bad either. 

because of poor counting skills and trains, we lost 30 minutes. not the worst thing. we saw a large group of humpbacks doing bubble net feeding over and over. that is just an amazing thing to watch. i'll toss more in another time. the top photo is that. we also saw sea lions the seas were calm enough to go where the baby rookery was. 

the whales moved around with each feed, so they did get pretty close to several boats out there.

we went to Holgate Glacier and skipped Aialik on this one. less seals but the captain knew the bubble net feeding was happening so i suspect he was booking to that, which i'm cool with. i'll get out there again one day hopefully. the tourists don't really know what they don't see. 

lots of whale tails and puffins of course.

my litter of kittens, well, not the best experience. it was 4 kittens and a sweet mom. she was extra toed and so were 3 of her 4 kittens. she came to me with a bad cold and the kittens were just 2 days old. i worked hard but sadly, the kittens began to succumb to fading kitten syndrome. kind of like sids but for kittens. they feel sl chilly, can't get them warmed, they stop feeding and then they just pass away.  just not enough immune response to save them. 3 passed within 24 hours. the 4th lasted nearly a week more but was fading like his siblings. i named the Mom Biscuits because she was kneading all the time. so sweet. the last kitten i named Sourdough.

as a foster, it was a tough and sad week. the Mom stayed the holiday weekend after i took Sourdough in for euthanasia. she has since been spayed and found a new home within a few days of being listed. she's a wonderful cat so i really hope she got a good home. sweet Biscuits.

the same day the kittens were all dying a bird flew into my bedroom. the bird had been brought in the house by Covid Kitty. thank you very much.  so it was a bit of an adventure catching and releasing that!

my knees have been pretty sore of late. making my hiking less fun. trying various things to improve them. i suspect getting in the pool for kickboard/swim time may help. it may just be that those muscles need to be strengthened around the knee joint. swimming is amazing, but kind of a hassle. 

just booked Homer for this stretch off. not a great low tide but a little bit of one, plus the fireweed is starting to pop.

a friend is going to fly north and meet me in Gustavus to see Glacier Bay. we will take a boat tour and a kayak tour. will be fun to be there at that time of year. may be some good mushrooms

my dishwasher died so i'll have to replace that. always something, right? i bought it back when i remodeled the kitchen. 2018. stuff just doesn't last that long anymore.

work, 2 days a week is fairly manageable. this week it was RCU the last two nights. not bad. i was a sitter for 5 hours on call back and another night ER.

our country is still falling apart. the right seems determined to turn us into some sort of white supremacy, Christian, dictatorship. they can't pay for education or health care for citizens but are more than willing to toss billions at hiring thugs to kidnap undocumented and even snag citizens. they have built detention camps and have been open about their plan to turn them into some sort of indentured servants.  work will set you free....the same message that was written on Auschwitz during the holocaust. this was the message that greeted the victims there.

most on the right seem oblivious to all of this. happy to sit in their safe bubbles and assume all is normal. it's not hard at all now to understand how this happened. we have all sorts of means of communication and information, but his followers brush off any actual facts as fake news. 

i guess the Epstein connection is waking a few up. i mean he's been associated with this horrible pedophile for decades but i suspect they figured it would just be democrats on the lists going to the island.   his corrupt doj first announced they were examining the lists then said the lists didn't exist. the base was hoping for a gotcha moment for the left but suddenly, many are thinking they may have been duped. suspect many will fall in line again. 

all the horrific stuff and them being lied to about him releasing all the information to own the libs. that is all they really care about is owning the libs.  they never cared about babies or kids. fetuses, yes, but not babies or kids. they are fine with children being ripped from their mothers' arms. they are fine with food being held and then incinerated that was to feed starving children.  this though, is the thing that is starting to wake a few of them up? they voted for a pedophile, many of them 3 times. 

they are usually lying about the orange idiots health but they just announced he has chronic vein issues. he's appeared to have bruising on hands (from iv's?) and his ankles are swollen. congestive heart failure? why tell now, garnish support and sympathy that dear leader is ill and may die. perhaps they will stage a hospitalization or another fake assassination attempt.

the abortion thing is still disastrous. of course, a Florida Gop rep got pregnant, it was found to be ectopic. normally now in Florida the woman would have to wait until she was nearly dead to have the abortion, but she got special permission.  they are clueless about the difference between actual life and potential life. 

it's all disturbing and disgusting. i do not think i can maintain civil conversations with people who are still supporting this horrible regime so i just avoid it. 

nature, like-minded people, kittens. these things distract and save me.

bubble feeding. so amazing.

overall, my heart breaks for the mistreatment of good people who are being taken in the streets, in places that were once safe. taken from work, courts. nothing is out of bounds for these thugs. they get bonus for each person grabbed and now sign on bonuses and high wage with minimal training. they hide their faces, refuse to identify themselves, have no warrants. they have rapidly opened camps in remote and inhospitable places. the disgusting maga cult members take selfies at the signs that are put up. 

fruit and vegetables go unpicked because the farm workers have either not shown up or get nabbed as they work. 

many are out there fighting back on these supposed Ice agents.  following them. videoing them, harassing them where they find shelter or food. 

truth is that the immigrants were a terrible group to go after. they are in homes, at jobs. they keep this nation going. they are this silent work force. the right wants to turn them into even poorer labor, slave labor/indentured servants. these fucker agents are doing sweeps of parks. collecting caregivers of children, putting the kids in vans to be returned to wealthy families who have hired undocumented nannies. not traumatizing at all. they just love kids, right?

they probably would have been more successful if they had gone after homeless people first. that sounds awful i know, but it would have been a group that wasn't as beloved and needed for society to function. 

this asshole regime is taking away refugees who have fled war zones and found safety here. people who helped us in Iraq and Afghanistan. just want to send them back to sure death. they are heartless. 

they ignore the rules and the constitution.  they never suffer any consequences. money rules. 

cormorants.

things are mostly out of my hands and my social media will make me a target at some point. speaking out is all i have at this point.  

sadly, i think the right has to implode before we can even begin to start to try to swing the pendulum back to middle and then to a better place. my positive hope is that it does happen eventually, we then get better education and healthcare. the right who are just trying to take us back to a place where only white men held the power, will be vanquished or at least silenced a bit again.  they fear losing the power, really, they fear that they will be treated, by what was the minority, the way they have treated the minority for generations.

not sure where i will walk tomorrow. i never decide until i decide it seems. i get a slow start every day. i feel like i do get some things done by doing stuff, taking a break, doing more stuff.  

i am the disappeared in my own way. so many have just cut themselves off from the trump supporters. he's had such a huge negative impact on this nation. one thing we do need to do in the future, after this horrible part of our history is getting behind us, is we need to acknowledge what has happened. we need to teach our real history. we need to abolish all the confederacy crap that was allowed to remain.  they were allowed to fly their flags and keep their kkk bull. 

they put a new patient in an ER room the other day. i went into one of my patient's rooms and saw the guy was wearing his maga hat. i was happy another nurse had signed up for him. 

someone had said treat those maga fools like they have treated minorities for years. cross the road, clutch your purse tighter, treat them like they are dirty and less than. i wonder how they came together again in Germany after all that. 

reflection on the boat. above is a spot we ate lunch at years ago on our first paddle of Holgate. we took photos in the ice, which came down much lower. i've paddled out there 3 times. beautiful. 

i can't possibly keep up with all the bad happening, which is the goal for those trying to destroy this nation. they want to overwhelm people so they can take total control. we are supposed to have elections in 2026, the midterms. will they happen? will they be legit? fair? 

i suspect those in power would love to lose the orange fool and have a more controllable vp move into that position.  unfortunately for them, the current vp doesn't have the command of the base that the orange food seems to have. he swept in and took over the cult they were creating. the tea party was taken over by the maga movement and they have less control over that because they have little control over taco. 

would love to wake up and not hear his name or see his face. 

still things to be grateful for A. bubble feeding, always a treat. B. overall good health C. those who fight against this, speak out. 

summer is fun...except the work part...:-)

 have had a run of Mondays and at least this week i finally made it to Tuesday. these are a mix of iphone pictures from this week.  summer is fun...last night i stayed with my friend MT out at Williwaw Campground out of Portage in her new fun camper!!  it rained through the night and into today so we opted to come home today over staying two nights.

 the camper was warm and cozy though and it was fun to get out!!  especially after a week of work.  hard to get motivated to move!!  so Thanks for letting us join you.  love the new camper!!  hope my bearded monsters didn't stink it up too badly.  :-) 

 just finished looking through the first group of photos from our whale watch cruise out of Seward on Monday...nope, no bubble feeding, but we did see quite a few whales and a young one that kept breaching.  so it was fun.  lots to see out there.  we had decent weather with low winds...still always a bit rocky out there and my one friend got a wee bit green.  still KR took far better photo's than i did, despite getting seasick.  she has taken the time and effort to really get to know her camera and learn how to use it....it's impressive what you can do when you aren't lazy. know yourself though...i remain the lazy gal who takes snap shots.  still lots of fun and great stress relief.

 we stopped at fox island to eat and chill for a few.  always a nice stop on the adventure.  this old guy found the the nice flat rocks there great for skipping...i find them great for stacking...even though some think  cairns are proof of my excessive ego and finds them equal to beer cans strewn about in nature...i commented back that it's over the top environmentalists such as those who have this bizarre hatred of cairns that give environmentalism a bad name. anything taken too far hurts a cause rather than helps it.  hopefully the GOP finds this out eventually as they try to pass total bans on abortion that would even put the MD's who perform them in jail for 99 years. 

 of course, they didn't learn the lesson with gay marriage so not sure why i have any hope of them learning from the past now.  initially gays only wanted an equivalent to marriage, but the GOP fought back so hard, they said screw it and pushed for marriage. 

 this is Holgate Glacier.  all those spots in front are seals hauled out on the ice.

 we stopped to enjoy the lupines on the way home from Seward.

 one of the evil cairns i made...i thought it turned out well.  it will also bring joy to the cairn crushers who get anger and joy from toppling them.  haha.

 selfies in the lupine

 a different cairn creation...knowing it pisses a few folks off only adds to my peace in creating them.

 i stopped to enjoy flowers today on the way home in the rain from Portage.

 a bit of a change in weather but we do need rain too.  my plants at home will be happy and perhaps it will help the wildflowers explode and i just love me some wildflowers.

 in addition to lupine today i saw the columbines are out as well. 

 we walked after chilling in the camper, out at Byron.  there were still several tourists that made the walk despite the rain. 

 last night MT had to render aid and advice to some tourists.  that kid can throw well, but the guy who was supposed to catch that baseball was clearly not ready for the throw.  MT said there was a lot of blood and since the guy was knocked out she figured he should head to Prov for stitches and perhaps a CT. 

 seems the unit was full of tourists.  that was all i had my last two nights.  the nights that were Tuesday to the run of bad days I've had of late.

 not sure how i got this one to stay up...

 the columbine were by Girdwood

 MT dogs are a wee bit more mellow than my crew.  Tusker about killed himself when we tried to put him on her long camp leads.  he booked and thankfully his collar broke off before his neck broke.  they seemed fine off leash after than.  not keen on him breaking his neck.  tennis ball control works pretty well.  so we need a new collar...thankfully, MT had  a spare in her camper...she is a wonder!!

 Jake in interested in the item i am eating from the campfire.

 the iitoo had another interview with the so called "fake news" in which he showed his total disdain for the law.  he stated that he'd have no problem taking information about his opponents in the next election from foreign governments...which is illegal.  mostly crickets as usual from the right.  their agenda is more important than the law, more important than character or values...they are willing to give this iitoo a pass on any and all infractions...

 they continue to claim the Mueller report exonerates him of all until they actually bother to read it...but the GOP knows that most Americans won't bother to read it. 

 love all the summer flowers....so amazing!!

 always fun to have a night where your patients family questions you all night and are watching your every move...in the end what they were worried about wasn't what was happening.  people hit their breaking point and if you are on the wrong shift with them you are their battering ram.  emotionally at least.  i do wish them well despite being their battering ram. i asked for a different assignment the next night...I'm sure they were fine with that. they may have already requested i not return anyway. it can be tough to not take stuff personally out there, but you try. thanks to the co-workers who were supportive of me that night. 

 chocolate lillies.  they were also out there today. 

 wish i had seen that...260 combined Japanese and US troops parachuted to the ground at JBER or as part of a JBER training event.

 reading some news...bear attack in the interior.  fires on the Kenai and the interior. 

 may be attempting to eat a s'more with a crowd of dogs.

 the snow at Byron.  the glacier is fairly far up..it's receded a lot since i moved here.

 our boat in the background for our whale watch cruise. 

 the Mini Skelly's decided to join on the camping adventure.  they are back out front with all the Skelly Crew...but are excited to join on other adventures this summer.  it's a new thing for them but they seemed to fair well out there on the road!!

 the murder of a young girl out at Thunderbird Falls keeps getting worse...there are more and more kids added to the list it seems who were aware of or assisted in this murder.  pretty disgusting. 

 with the dogs on the snow/ice out at Byron

 thinking i will hit the hay early tonight.  may try to finish out looking at the whale pictures though.

 with the rain the big camera did not make any appearances today.  i opted for just the little camera.

 the iphone always loads out of any sort of order but i guess that keeps in interesting.

 really not that tight in this sweet camper despite two adults and 4 good sized dogs.

 not ready financially for a camper but i do go back and forth...trailer, camper van, truck with a camper...i suspect the last may be the most practical.  the camper van is another vehicle so more insurance where as the trailer and the truck camper are much cheaper insurance wise.  would need a serious truck for that though.  camper van sounds great though if i could find a deal at some point.  gotta pay off some stuff....like the remodel before i can plan for my future camping toys.

 Jake was king of the hill as he had stolen the tennis ball...not an easy feat with my two....well earned bragging rights.

 just sprinkles last night while we chilled by the campfire but we did put up the shelter....she is prepared for anything!!

 Skelly's, dogs and MT chilling by the fire

 an Anchorage citizen perished in Girdwood when he slipped from the hand tram platform while trying to pull it

 wild snapdragons or monkey flower.  these were on the side of the road close to  trickling waterfall. they like water.  grow in clumps. had to get the book, i knew it had monkey in it. 

 the fire last night.  perfect.

 the rest are from the past 24 hours.

 bills, trash, laundry...some stuff to get done before i head out for a walk tomorrow. will see what the weather is doing in the morning before choosing my destination. 

 hopefully more flowers...it is that time!!

 dogs are pretty sleeping this evening.  amazing how exhausting altering their routine is for them.

 they had a great time though i think.  it's a nice campground.  i have never stayed there before.  the bathrooms were clean, it was quiet....the spaces are amble and separated from each other for privacy.  bears have been spotted, but it is AK and it's summer.  you can't avoid them totally. we never saw any.  Tusker and Ivy Rose did spot a squirrel.  they gave chase. no squirrels were harmed.  thankfully, they are better at chasing than apprehending.

 the last of the lupine til next time. 

thankful for: A.  support of co-workers  B. finally getting to move on from Mondays and feeling like i got my groove back at work.  C. a week of fun little adventures with friends!!