Monday, September 28, 2015

moose and mountains

 goals for this week.  order more calendars.  buy plane tickets for Thanksgiving trip to CA.
 these are some kincaid shots and then the start of a drive north earlier this month.  hope i don't bore you with all the scenery shots.  fall is short here and i tend to chase it around all i can.  winter drops in fast though...there is some talk of snow by later this week.  Fairbanks and Denali have gotten quite a lot of snow already.
 the house smells delicious as i am baking brownies. hopefully, i can keep from burning them.
 busy three nights....all in the ER.  that place can wipe me out....and occasionally test my patience.  last night it was testing my patience with fellow nurses i was giving report to.  some nurses are so silly, it's like they want to catch you up or something.  one nurse i nearly said, "you realize i am an ICU nurse?".  she seemed hell bent on proving me incompetent or something.  funny thing was, she was the one who was confused reading the orders.  my ducks were in a row
 then, this ICU nurse calls me about 45 min later to tell me the patient had left against medical advice and was angry with me for not warning her of his agitation.  guess he'd thrown urinals at her?  not sure but i informed her that the patient had not caused me any trouble at all.  wanted to say that either the patient had been too ill to cause trouble or maybe...she'd set him off.  either way, i informed her i could not inform her of something that did not exist when the patient was in my care.
 a few minutes later we got a call from EMS who were outside to pick up said patient who had called 9-1-1, apparently he wanted to go to a different hospital.  no idea what happened, but this is not my fault.  thankfully, i have no problem speaking my mind and people who try to bully me find themselves backed into a corner.  growing up in a big family one learns to defend oneself.  back off...had a few of those that night.  silly people.  no i'm not called for an as needed order based on one abnormal blood pressure.
 finally, the last patient i called report on i spoke with a lovely nurse up in PCU.  so easy, so pleasant....this is how it should be and how it is most days.  often i think when people are all picky and detailed and trying to slip you up it's really their own lack of self esteem.  only people who have little confidence try to hide it by berating others.
 was in a room with a patient who was clearly distraught and my phone kept ringing.  when i came out it turns out someone was trying to save me from this frequent flyer and generally drug seeking patient.  i know those patients can be tough but honestly i am usually pretty good at escaping rooms.  i try to give people the benefit of the doubt.
 kindness costs nothing and as long as you don't let yourself be taken advantage of and set limits you can do alright.  you just never know what people have been through in their lives and what has gotten them to the place they are at.  kind of a there but for the grace of God go I kind of thinker.  i took all that do not judge stuff to heart.  i figure we all have different lessons to learn in this life and different paths to get to those lessons.  you just can't understand anothers journey.
 Matanuska Glacier and Valley.  always so beautiful in the fall colors.
 munching on iceberg lettuce.  my mom used to get upset with me when i was a kid and i'd be off just munching on a head of lettuce.  of course, i do find it ironic that later in my teen years i was a bit chided for being overweight....if she'd only just bought loads of lettuce perhaps i never would have gained the weight to begin with.
 it's been awhile since i hit a movie.  tonight went with a friend to see "Everest". i thought it was really well done. i've read other books by Kraukaur but haven't gotten around to "into thin air". will have to sit down with it.
 not really sure what drives people to want to do a trek like climb Everest but sometimes things go terribly wrong and it can happen very quickly in a place such as that.  too often these days people who are ill prepared but well off can experience adventures that would have been off limits to them.  they just hire others to risk their lives getting them to their goals.  probably goes along with our instant gratification society.  many don't necessarily want to do the work but do want to reach the same goals as those who do the work.
 in this event there were a few businesses that were guiding folks up the mountain. one leader seemed to have the feeling that if you couldn't reach the top on your own then you had no business going on while the other seemed to earnestly want to help others  reach their goals, even if they needed some coddling.  on this adventure sadly, several died.  the one guy had relented against all common sense when his one client insisted that he could summit even though he'd missed the window for timing.  they both died.
 often the most important thing in life is to know your limitations and to be willing to fail.  many in our society are not learning to fail.  everyone is a winner,everyone can do everything...but everyone can't. it takes technical skills to climb a mountain or do other adventures, it also takes an emotional element and even a fool hardiness.  arrogance is also required.  i remember watching this ted talks about a guy who had done this solo trek.  some said in the comments they thought he was occurred to me that true adventures need to have a crazy arrogance to them or they would never even attempt the crazy things they do.  you have to have enough confidence to dream.
 those who live in fear will never be the adventurers.
 the movie has a 3D version though we did not see that version.  i'm happy we didn't.  it almost seems disrespectful to those who died to show their story in 3D.  watching a re-enactment of people falling down the mountain in 3D just seems a bit wrong to me.'s a good movie about a sad event.
 mostly got my steps in this week, though more at work than on walks these past 2 days...i owe Blossom big.  just a few days off and then back to work again.
 one night i got all my hold patients shipped off and was able to leave work about 45 minutes early...always nice.
above was tourists lined up to take pictures of the glacier at the viewpoint.
 one night i forgot my badge. i rarely do this but what a bother it is when you do. we have to scan stuff with ourselves...thankfully, i really didn't end up needing my badge that much and a friend lent me theirs just in case i needed to transport patients and needed to get through doors.
 these are from a short walk at the Matanuska viewpoint/campground.  always  a good place to stop and stretch my legs..and the dogs as well.

 sent a friend at fish and game a text just saying if anyone at fish and game wanted stickers or calendars to let me know...he called and left a message so i called back.  could hardly understand anything he said...i think he was saying i can't take those things to the office and sell them as it would be a violation.  always so funny to me.  sometimes these guys just seem anxious that interacting with me may put their jobs at risk.  this at the same time that they want me to help out with Round Island.
 when we did the petition i remember just saying i understand you are anxious to sign these things yourselves, but surely you can encourage your friends and families to support the place through WARIS efforts.
 so many strange political aspects to trying to protect this place that i just wasn't really aware of when i jumped in. working with fish and game is just an aspect of that. working with the native culture when it comes to this seems delicate proposition to me as well.
 they hunt walrus, they eat walrus, they carve ivory for sale.  guess it always seems to me that they should be totally committed to saving and protecting walrus populations in order to preserve their way of life.  often though, there is anger at intrusion into their way of life, of our government dictating how many of this or that they can harvest, of how to use their land.  i want to try and be inclusive and respectful of their way of life and their traditions while trying to protect this animal and place that i have grown to love.
 i have ivory carvings in my house. when i first came up to Alaska i discovered the beauty of native art.   at some level you have to trust that the artists have the ivory from a legal take of a walrus or from combing beaches for ivory and finding a walrus that has died of natural causes.  i wonder if in the future there should be more of a way to track these art items so that the buyer could have more assurance that there is no poaching involved.  no doubt most of the art out there is legal take and when you buy from legitimate sources the risk is low i guess...but still how do we assure ourselves and others of the legality of the ivory.
love the sheep mountain area....those mountains are just so beautiful.
 check out those fall colors.
 rain today....pretty hard at times.  i still got a few things accomplished.  i was trying to kill time because we can do our schedule online after 9 am.  after working all night i figured i'd just stay up and get that done.  cat litter, laundry....i was so sleepy. i probably should check and make sure i didn't sign up for day shifts or something.
 dang thing didn't come up at 9 am though.  i think it was well after 9:30 am when they popped out.  that was irritating.  if you don't get in there on time your schedule could get pretty ugly.  so far it hasn't been much of an issue, but then i always try to get on in the first few hours it's open.
 i will probably crash pretty hard today.
 i gotta get my PALS done for work and get a TB test.  did manage to get my flu shot this week.
 this is Lions Head..a prominent little mountain on the drive.
 not sure what news events happened this week.  work/sleep/work and more sleep.  in between i tuck in some WARIS stuff and then it starts all over again.
 these are headed to Glenallen.

 there was so much screaming in the ER this week.  people get nuts and man can they make a racket when they do.  they can get pretty violent too.  for sure more risk of personal injury working in the ER.  now all this crazy spice stuff. i'm not the most expert on the whole drug world.  this spice crap seems pretty bad. almost like the old LSD paranoid/delusions or something.  you would think people would avoid that crap. it's almost time for PFD's to hit the streets of AK.  (Permanent Fund Dividend).  that money is distributed too all and until i worked ER it hadn't really occurred to me that this windfall would be spent by many on illegal drugs and alcohol.  overdoses all over the place.
 it's pretty sad how many people's lives are destroyed by drugs...such a bad thing to get hooked on.  such a waste.
 amazing colors coming through.

 guess i should really settle in for the night.
 another Monday, another Monday walk . no speedy this week.
 hope you enjoyed the colors of fall in Alaska...i know i always do.
thankful for: A.  help...plenty of it in the ER last night B.  nurses and other staff who are kind with each other.  C.  that i never got lost to drugs or alcohol.  what a mess....night.

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