"good" emotions vs "bad" emotions

 

was thinking the other day about how we were raised to believe that there were good emotions and bad emotions. we were made to believe we needed to suppress all of those bad emotions and only feel good emotions. any bad emotion was a negative reflection of us. such a strange way to screw up people. all emotions are valid. not good or bad. it's really just what you do with your emotion that deems what sort of person you. perhaps this is one of the reasons for all the rage in the right. they have suppressed all those "bad" emotions and they have to be released somewhere.

thought i'd toss in some pictures from a wildlife boat trip out of Seward the other day. i'm trying to have some fun plans for each stretch off. this week it was the train to Spencer Glacier to walk and this boat trip.  the calm seas hit Monday and the weather wasn't bad either. 

because of poor counting skills and trains, we lost 30 minutes. not the worst thing. we saw a large group of humpbacks doing bubble net feeding over and over. that is just an amazing thing to watch. i'll toss more in another time. the top photo is that. we also saw sea lions the seas were calm enough to go where the baby rookery was. 

the whales moved around with each feed, so they did get pretty close to several boats out there.

we went to Holgate Glacier and skipped Aialik on this one. less seals but the captain knew the bubble net feeding was happening so i suspect he was booking to that, which i'm cool with. i'll get out there again one day hopefully. the tourists don't really know what they don't see. 

lots of whale tails and puffins of course.

my litter of kittens, well, not the best experience. it was 4 kittens and a sweet mom. she was extra toed and so were 3 of her 4 kittens. she came to me with a bad cold and the kittens were just 2 days old. i worked hard but sadly, the kittens began to succumb to fading kitten syndrome. kind of like sids but for kittens. they feel sl chilly, can't get them warmed, they stop feeding and then they just pass away.  just not enough immune response to save them. 3 passed within 24 hours. the 4th lasted nearly a week more but was fading like his siblings. i named the Mom Biscuits because she was kneading all the time. so sweet. the last kitten i named Sourdough.

as a foster, it was a tough and sad week. the Mom stayed the holiday weekend after i took Sourdough in for euthanasia. she has since been spayed and found a new home within a few days of being listed. she's a wonderful cat so i really hope she got a good home. sweet Biscuits.

the same day the kittens were all dying a bird flew into my bedroom. the bird had been brought in the house by Covid Kitty. thank you very much.  so it was a bit of an adventure catching and releasing that!

my knees have been pretty sore of late. making my hiking less fun. trying various things to improve them. i suspect getting in the pool for kickboard/swim time may help. it may just be that those muscles need to be strengthened around the knee joint. swimming is amazing, but kind of a hassle. 

just booked Homer for this stretch off. not a great low tide but a little bit of one, plus the fireweed is starting to pop.

a friend is going to fly north and meet me in Gustavus to see Glacier Bay. we will take a boat tour and a kayak tour. will be fun to be there at that time of year. may be some good mushrooms

my dishwasher died so i'll have to replace that. always something, right? i bought it back when i remodeled the kitchen. 2018. stuff just doesn't last that long anymore.

work, 2 days a week is fairly manageable. this week it was RCU the last two nights. not bad. i was a sitter for 5 hours on call back and another night ER.

our country is still falling apart. the right seems determined to turn us into some sort of white supremacy, Christian, dictatorship. they can't pay for education or health care for citizens but are more than willing to toss billions at hiring thugs to kidnap undocumented and even snag citizens. they have built detention camps and have been open about their plan to turn them into some sort of indentured servants.  work will set you free....the same message that was written on Auschwitz during the holocaust. this was the message that greeted the victims there.

most on the right seem oblivious to all of this. happy to sit in their safe bubbles and assume all is normal. it's not hard at all now to understand how this happened. we have all sorts of means of communication and information, but his followers brush off any actual facts as fake news. 

i guess the Epstein connection is waking a few up. i mean he's been associated with this horrible pedophile for decades but i suspect they figured it would just be democrats on the lists going to the island.   his corrupt doj first announced they were examining the lists then said the lists didn't exist. the base was hoping for a gotcha moment for the left but suddenly, many are thinking they may have been duped. suspect many will fall in line again. 

all the horrific stuff and them being lied to about him releasing all the information to own the libs. that is all they really care about is owning the libs.  they never cared about babies or kids. fetuses, yes, but not babies or kids. they are fine with children being ripped from their mothers' arms. they are fine with food being held and then incinerated that was to feed starving children.  this though, is the thing that is starting to wake a few of them up? they voted for a pedophile, many of them 3 times. 

they are usually lying about the orange idiots health but they just announced he has chronic vein issues. he's appeared to have bruising on hands (from iv's?) and his ankles are swollen. congestive heart failure? why tell now, garnish support and sympathy that dear leader is ill and may die. perhaps they will stage a hospitalization or another fake assassination attempt.

the abortion thing is still disastrous. of course, a Florida Gop rep got pregnant, it was found to be ectopic. normally now in Florida the woman would have to wait until she was nearly dead to have the abortion, but she got special permission.  they are clueless about the difference between actual life and potential life. 

it's all disturbing and disgusting. i do not think i can maintain civil conversations with people who are still supporting this horrible regime so i just avoid it. 

nature, like-minded people, kittens. these things distract and save me.

bubble feeding. so amazing.

overall, my heart breaks for the mistreatment of good people who are being taken in the streets, in places that were once safe. taken from work, courts. nothing is out of bounds for these thugs. they get bonus for each person grabbed and now sign on bonuses and high wage with minimal training. they hide their faces, refuse to identify themselves, have no warrants. they have rapidly opened camps in remote and inhospitable places. the disgusting maga cult members take selfies at the signs that are put up. 

fruit and vegetables go unpicked because the farm workers have either not shown up or get nabbed as they work. 

many are out there fighting back on these supposed Ice agents.  following them. videoing them, harassing them where they find shelter or food. 

truth is that the immigrants were a terrible group to go after. they are in homes, at jobs. they keep this nation going. they are this silent work force. the right wants to turn them into even poorer labor, slave labor/indentured servants. these fucker agents are doing sweeps of parks. collecting caregivers of children, putting the kids in vans to be returned to wealthy families who have hired undocumented nannies. not traumatizing at all. they just love kids, right?

they probably would have been more successful if they had gone after homeless people first. that sounds awful i know, but it would have been a group that wasn't as beloved and needed for society to function. 

this asshole regime is taking away refugees who have fled war zones and found safety here. people who helped us in Iraq and Afghanistan. just want to send them back to sure death. they are heartless. 

they ignore the rules and the constitution.  they never suffer any consequences. money rules. 

cormorants.

things are mostly out of my hands and my social media will make me a target at some point. speaking out is all i have at this point.  

sadly, i think the right has to implode before we can even begin to start to try to swing the pendulum back to middle and then to a better place. my positive hope is that it does happen eventually, we then get better education and healthcare. the right who are just trying to take us back to a place where only white men held the power, will be vanquished or at least silenced a bit again.  they fear losing the power, really, they fear that they will be treated, by what was the minority, the way they have treated the minority for generations.

not sure where i will walk tomorrow. i never decide until i decide it seems. i get a slow start every day. i feel like i do get some things done by doing stuff, taking a break, doing more stuff.  

i am the disappeared in my own way. so many have just cut themselves off from the trump supporters. he's had such a huge negative impact on this nation. one thing we do need to do in the future, after this horrible part of our history is getting behind us, is we need to acknowledge what has happened. we need to teach our real history. we need to abolish all the confederacy crap that was allowed to remain.  they were allowed to fly their flags and keep their kkk bull. 

they put a new patient in an ER room the other day. i went into one of my patient's rooms and saw the guy was wearing his maga hat. i was happy another nurse had signed up for him. 

someone had said treat those maga fools like they have treated minorities for years. cross the road, clutch your purse tighter, treat them like they are dirty and less than. i wonder how they came together again in Germany after all that. 

reflection on the boat. above is a spot we ate lunch at years ago on our first paddle of Holgate. we took photos in the ice, which came down much lower. i've paddled out there 3 times. beautiful. 

i can't possibly keep up with all the bad happening, which is the goal for those trying to destroy this nation. they want to overwhelm people so they can take total control. we are supposed to have elections in 2026, the midterms. will they happen? will they be legit? fair? 

i suspect those in power would love to lose the orange fool and have a more controllable vp move into that position.  unfortunately for them, the current vp doesn't have the command of the base that the orange food seems to have. he swept in and took over the cult they were creating. the tea party was taken over by the maga movement and they have less control over that because they have little control over taco. 

would love to wake up and not hear his name or see his face. 

still things to be grateful for A. bubble feeding, always a treat. B. overall good health C. those who fight against this, speak out.