Showing posts with label polka dot snowman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label polka dot snowman. Show all posts

Monday, February 20, 2017

passing...

 Ivy inspects the troops.  cracks me up when she jumps up on the table outside.  she really is quite the jumper.  we have had quite a bit of snow this week.  this day the snow was super wet and i immediately thought...snowmen!
 i made a total of 21 little snowmen and they still line the deck railing to some degree.  of course, some meltage has happened and some snow has covered them up.  Ivy also has knocked over a few.
 they do look pretty bright and happy.
 this week it was particularly nice to see my little colored snowmen out there....it was a sad week.  my nephew passed away. thankfully, it seems it was fairly peaceful as far as these things go.  difficult to sleep after getting the news.  mostly my heart ached for my brother and his family and all that a loss of this magnitude takes on folks.  they sound like they have had a lot of love and support.  the perks of religion, friends and just being good and likable people.  we have spoken a few times.  he'd texted me and the other siblings in a family text.  i texted back...but some things just can't be done via text...probably a lot more things shouldn't be done via text, but anyway. i called him when i got home that morning.
 often calls over the next weeks and months are needed.  loss tends to come in waves.  Bryce had many medical issues in his life.  he did live to 25 years despite predictions of much less.  that is a testament to the care he received.  Darla's family have lived near by for many years and i know they were a great help to them...very grateful to their generous spirits as well.  wish i could have been more help.  he had many seizures when he was younger.   he had seizures his whole life actually.  he was having one when he passed.
 my last night at work was a bit emotional.  i worked PICU...had a young patient.  he probably passed today.  then i got another little one who is sick as well.  when you work in medicine you can generally keep yourself at some distance emotionally from all the sadness you deal with at work.  death...but when you are dealing with a death close to you as well, the lines get blurred and it can be tougher to hold back your emotions.
 thankfully, PICU is staffed with super kind people.  with your friends you get through those tough days.
 we skipped walks twice this week.  lack of sleep.  yesterday i did manage a bog/neighborhood walk.  there is one bit in the bog where the puppies seem to bolt every time now.  brats!! i think there are rabbits there.  once they were spotted once, it's nearly impossible for me to hold those puppies back there.  avoided a second area by taking off into the hood.
 today we headed to gasline.  i slept a lot.  napped last night, woke up and watched a movie.  then i slept again til late today.  i finally made it to the trail after 3:30 i think.
 a toy from our bark box...looked cute on Ivy.  she is a cutie! she likes to sit in my lap...she is not small.  i was able to let them off leash out there. did see some dogs, but i would call to see if they were neutered/fixed.  if they were then i could just let her play.
 below she is up on the wood pile inspecting troops.
 look pretty cool lined up, right?
 the movie i watched was, "the imitation game".  very well done i thought. code breakers during WWII.  early computer work and the guy who was a brilliant mathematician but maybe not the most personable guy was the one who created the machine to crack the code. once they cracked it they had to be careful so that Germany wouldn't know it was broken...that meant they had to play God to some degree and allow some attacks to go forward without intervention.  he was also gay and was later convicted of lewd or indecent acts.  some time after this he committed suicide.
 not sure exact quote from the movie but i did like it, " the people that no one imagines much of often do the things that no one imagines".
 i also have taken the scissors to my hair these past few days.  not sure why i do that.  i have proven repeatedly that i am not overly skilled in hair cutting.  i'll have to go get a repair cut at some point.  nobody is really looking at me anyway...maybe if i have a crappy haircut they will...haha.
 i actually may have put these pictures in...moose, never tire of them

 my first night of work i was put on call...briefly. literally for 10 minutes i think. on the plus side i got overtime for my entire shift.
 they called me in to do respiratory therapy.  the RT's didn't need me as it turns out because someone came to work that they weren't expecting.  once you are there they have to pay you for 2 hours.  wasn't too keen on leaving and then just getting called back in a few minutes later again anyway.  after those 2 hours was up ER grabbed me up.  i was there the next night as well.
 back at the beach...
 second night i was in ER as well.
 Tusker and Ivy turn 1 on Tuesday.  was thinking of making cupcakes for the Monday walk anyway.
 not doing that tonight.
 i'll take nyquil and hope this doesn't get worse.
 big sky


  as i mentioned, my nephew Bryce passed away the other day.  i got a text from my brother when i was getting ready to leave work.  Bryce lived with medical issues every day and his folks, my brother and his wife, were absolutely amazing with him.  they kept a sense of humor about them, they kept positive, they never complained that i heard.  in short, they gave him the best possible life he could have ever hoped for.
 my heart goes out to them as they go forward without Bryce here with them.  he lived many years more than the medical community suggested he would.  the funeral is next Sat. there are no quick weekends from AK to the lower 48.  i can give you a litany of excuses none of which would really suffice i guess, but i will not make the flight south for the funeral. tough timing wise.  the flight/airport time would be extensive for the short time i would be there.  my brother was willing to even pay the ticket as all the other siblings will be there.  so i feel sad and guilty but after looking at the flight options again today i decided it was best to just let myself move forward,let it go. i told my brother i hope they would save the money for the ticket and use it for a trip,maybe to AK again.   woke up feeling like crap today as well.  sore throat,aches...if i end up sick then for sure i will know it was the right decision. don't want to bring AK bugs to my entire family. i do appreciate my brothers kindness and generous offer.  i also appreciate that he was understanding whatever decision i ended up making.
 a few oldies of the Blossom and Rio.  Ivy is in heat still as well.  finding dog care at the last minute is not easy and no boarding facility would take an in heat dog.  i don't blame them for that.  actually have never had a dog in heat since i was a kid i guess.  those dogs always seemed to get out and knocked up, thus i was often in front of Ralphs grocery store with puppies or kittens looking for homes.  having adults yell at me for not having gotten my pets spayed...i was 10...like i had that power or understanding.
 though i won't be at the funeral.  i did feel inspired the other day to write a poem on behalf of my brother and his family.
 Bryce
too often,
in life,
we pity those,
who live bravely,
with disabilities.
we think of them,
in terms of what we have,
and not in terms,
of what they have.
as i recall,
Bryce,
a smile comes to mind,
his smile,
it seemed,
to never end.
he lived free,
free of hatred,
free of greed,
free of self loathing,
free of sadness,
free of a hurt heart.
Bryce knew,
only love.
his family,
loved him,
without fail,
they gave freely,
of their love,
and their time.
sacrifice,
it would seem,
to those on the outside,
but,
i know,
to them,
each day with Bryce,
was never
a sacrifice,
each day with Bryce,
was a gift.
there are no words really,
to describe,
the dedication, respect and kindness,
that was shared with this sweet soul.
oft in life,
what at first,
seems like,
a challenge,
a test,
a struggle.
becomes,
the greatest lesson,
the greatest strength,
we could have never imagined.
soar,
conquer heaven,
for your life,
simple and pure,
made the lives,
of those you touched,
more meaningful,
more kind and more joyous.
may your message of love,
be with us always.

grateful for: A.  words...being able to express myself  B.  my brother and his wife for the example they have been.  C. snow, it makes me smile

Sunday, October 23, 2016

the vote is in....

 the puppies love snow!!  the other vote we shall all have to wait for.  easy to guess who I'm not rooting for with this blog. look how handsome my boy Tusker looks with snow on him.
 i also did some test runs on the costumes i have here for the pups.  they were tired from the walk so seemed my best hope.  they were less than amused and having 2 of them means they not only try to bite off the costume i put on them, but they help their sibling try to take their costume off as well.  some folks are coming over for the chill pumpkin massacre tomorrow.
 not the best week for the pups while i was at work.  probably due to my being a bit lazy...well not really lazy, but sick.  in their minds it's lazy though.  they are used to walks and when they don't get walked...well stuff can happen.  this was a John Muir book.  hadn't finished it...will have to buy it on the ipad i guess.  yet another reason to shift to ipad reading.  did buy some new reading glasses. my reading has been less than normal of late...I'm now thinking it's because all my reading glasses seem to have disappeared.  they are like socks I'm finding.
 the book was the better of the two mornings i came home. i generally leave the gate door open to the outdoor dog run.  i have been fretting about this.  what if's running through my mind and this caused me to panic the other night and close the outside gate to the run.  see pic 3 down...that is the carpet on the stairs.  demolished. that is not a good thing.  perhaps they were so excited watching the snow fall all night and not being able to get to it.
 selfishly i really wanted to be there for their first snowfall...i think that also worked on my brain to shut the gate.  i do worry about stuff with them out there.  they have chips in but i take their collars off at home.  so i worry there will be wind and the fence will come down and they will get out...or a big quake.  or someone will throw food laced with poison over the fence. or steal them..see how my mind can panic.  for years i would have these awful dreams where Blossom was on the verge of death and I'd wake up without knowing the outcome.
 admittedly, I'm probably too attached to these dogs.  all of them.  i have been for years.  not having kids...these are my family.  they are the ones i come home to. the ones i walk with.  dogs are always committed to you, always loyal and never have a bad thing to say about you. they forgive and forget and they are your greatest fan...who wouldn't love that!!
 i have had boyfriends jealous of my relationship with my dogs.  love me, love my dog, that is for sure.  clearly, i haven't found a person who loves me and my dogs.  i never wanted the pets to be a battle...even when they pull this stuff, below on the carpet.  the orange color is shortening laced with a great deal of cayenne pepper.  hopefully, to prevent further chewing.
 i debated calling out sick Wednesday...the bronchial asthma symptoms had kicked in..for me that means being short of breath and coughing a lot!! a lot...if you haven't been around me for this.  i can puke pretty easily with the coughing.  i also had a migraine on Wednesday...it had subsided so i decided to give work a try.  worked ICU 2 nights.  assignment wasn't bad for all my coughing, i wore a mask to protect everyone.
 after 2 nights of coughing i was totally wiped out and opted out of that third night.  my chest was hurting when i walked fast.  came home to snow...which was beautiful.  that day i slept a lot.  actually i took dogs for a walk...a slow walk.  aside from that i slept until the next day.  i woke at2:30 that day, walked, then i woke again around 7:30, fed the dogs, woke briefly at 9:30 pm and then it was morning.
 ice from the ground.  the ground was busy freezing up before this snow came.  it's always cool to watch.  if it freezes before that first snow we have a good chance of keeping the snow....if it doesn't warm up like it has off and on the past 2 winters.  hoping for a good snow year though, we all are.
 the puppies came to the door the morning it snowed and just stopped and looked outside.  they were not too sure what to make of it, but then they were off like a bolt and when i next woke up, i don't think there was more than a few inches of yard that has not been trampled on.  they are huge fans of snow it seems
 the last 2 days we have walked up the airstrip and then around.  went slow.  stopped for coughing, inhalers...the dogs are not in a hurry to get anywhere, thankfully, they just wanted to be out there having fun and running around.
 was going to hit N Biv today but there was some trucks blocking the road and the cars were stacking up. no idea what was up, but i opted to not sit in a line of cars when i could just turn around and walk in another area.  the dogs could care less if we do a repeat trail.  we did loop around the homestead way.  no moose spotted the last 2 days.
 blossom in the crate.  she is so sweet and cute.  she's taking over the crate as her own.  how can i turn the sweet girl down . probably gives her a break from the kids.  she does love them though.  i think she just likes her own space.  so it will stay where it is.
 sorry these are all mixed up.  cell phone pics and pics from the bigger camera later.
 from last weeks Monday walk.  no snow yet.
 finally made it to the store to pick up some pumpkins . spendy buggers, but so fun.  I'll have to try and carve one before everyone gets here, just so i have one out there. my house cleaning/decorating has not been a priority of late...puppies and then add to that me feeling ill.
 did try to do a few things tonight.  that is what led me to putting costumes on the dogs.  not sure they can be trusted for the entire night with costumes on.  they may destroy them.
 the polka dot snowmen are back.  was too tired the other day to really get down and make loads of them, but here is one that i made on the back deck.  it was heavy/wet snow
 Ivy checking out what I'm doing.
 she does photograph well.
 here is the ice that i was holding but still in the ground

 a friend on the trail snapped a pic of me with the dogs. not my best look.  at 50 not sure i will have too many best look pictures at this point.  again...the dogs could care less about my age and how i look.  gotta love animals!!
 saw this young bald eagle the other day on the road.

 a few days out at campbell airstrip trails

 it was cloudy yesterday and bright and sunny today.
 the pups are pretty sleepy tonight.  both are here in the office, out!
 for my walking, they run circles around me.  they certainly do not act tired at all during the walk . it's getting tougher to walk both of them on leash together.  the pulling is rough especially with greetings.  they actually did much better off leash. I'd call them off trail and they'd come right over, sit and eat treats from me as whatever/whoever passed us by.  got many compliments.  these same pups on leash though...frustrating.  not helping that i have this tendinitis on my left arm or that today as i was trying to load them up they noticed the new neighbors outside with their dog and a cat.  they are moving their lives over to the new place.  i got tossed pretty hard into the wall on my deck.  it's sore and super swollen...bruises to follow I'm sure.
 it bites getting older...all these little aches and pains that just seem to develop.  not complaining too much . it beats so many alternatives.  i see the health issues that totally take over others lives and i know that overall i am pretty dang lucky.
 these guys have loads of energy and the snow is just super fun to wrestle in.  i did manage to get them to the side of the trail on leash as a skier went past.  she expressed much gratitude that the dogs were all leashed up..i didn't have the heart to tell her that up until the last 1/2 mile of my walk they were off leash.  they really did great listening off leash though. i was pretty happy with that part of the day.
 last debate is over, thank the lord.  Drumpf made it clear that he has no intention of going quietly into the night if he should lose. i fear his supporters won't either.  likely to be the first time in my lifetime that there could be blood shed after an election.
 watching him these last weeks I'm becoming more convinced that he is possibly mentally unbalanced.  i suspect this, that his wealth and position has meant that those in close proximity have covered for him all these years and now that he is out there on the trail, added stress, no down time.  they can't protect him and he's probably not aware he has any issues.
 my other thought is that since US banks are not keen on dealing with him anymore he needs the help of foreign banks.  perhaps...deals were made and his goal all along was simply to use the hatred of HRC to destroy or at least breakdown the GOP.  probably could have swung the other way and made the attempt with the Dems, but the visceral hatred of HRC gives him the advantage of manipulating those who vote Republican.  hatred makes you weak in a way.  it makes you more open to manipulation and hearing negative over truth even.
 i guess option 3 is that I'm totally wrong and he's the greatest guy on earth and will make America great if he gets in.  I'm not buying that option though.  I'm more convinced it's option 1 or 2.  we may never know.
 he's threatened to sue the women who came forward.  he often threatens to sue.  it may not be in his best interest though.  the more time, effort and money he puts to this probably makes it more apparent that it is true.
 neither of these candidates should be our next POTUS...but these are the choices we have for the moment.  still another few weeks.  God only knows what else will come out of this circus of a run for POTUS.  I'm afraid to look.  of course, the media is already saying HRC has won. I'm not one to buy into those polls.  I'd rather they just not give their guesses as to how the election will roll. i  also don't agree with the play by play as the polls close across the nation.  folks like us in AK and Hawaii should be able to just vote and not have the results in and contest over before our polling booths have closed.  there should be none of these announcements until after the last polling place has closed.  my state will no doubt go Drumpf.  we have a nut job in the house that 's been there since we've become a state.  he says some outlandish stuff and still he keeps getting voted in.
 totally read a sad story.  there was a house fire in the lower 48.  in the end, a dead child was found curled up with a teddy bear and the family dog, dead also.  they suspect the dog went to be with the child.  maybe it tried to save the kid but gave up and lay with the child to the end. so sad.
 cloudy day pics came out too dark. part of me thinks it's my catch all lens.  i like it but it does have some limits i think.
 today was more sunny.  they had a great time running all over.  lots of pups to play with out there.
 Blossom joined in some as well.
 need to look at the holiday schedule.  see how that played out . also need to sign dogs up for more classes.  clearly they could use more training.  proofing is next up for Ivy Rose i guess.  it's just making sure they are good at what they have learned already.
 they are great tempered dogs and it would be cool to be able to get them well trained and possibly make them part of the dog visiting team to hospitals.
 have always wanted to do that. Tusker may be the best chance of that.  he could be a good will Walrus ambassador as well.
 the airstrip.  big enough to land a big jet on in the event of emergencies.
 for us...just a lot of snow to play in.  like that it's wide open too.  easier to spot wild beasts and avoid them.

 the sweetest doodle of all...my girl Blossom.  i better run.  the antitussive meds are kicking in.
grateful for: A.  my strong cough medicine so i can rest  B.  SNOW!! C.  Halloween.  love this holiday.  just fun, no demands, no commitments.