still saying both sides are the same and fake news?

 

as the orange fool has thanksgiving guests who praise hitler and want a christian theocracy run by a dictator. as the orange fool posts that he wants to suspend the constitution, which he supposedly vowed to uphold, so that he can be illegally reinstated as potus...??? it's baffling how so many can just look the other way at all the evidence that has cascaded out about who these people really are and what their goals really are.

so many i know have, over the years, read and watched so much about the holocaust.  they are i guess both fascinated and disturbed by it. yet, they would probably vote for this traitor again and again and again. they would simply look the other way at atrocities and just mutter fake news and but the other side is the same.  

i can assure you that nobody on the left is praising hitler nor are they suggesting the constitution be suspended for their own benefit. it's so outlandish.  i do not ask, mostly i do not even really engage in conversations at this point.  it just had gotten too depressing to be hit with the truth.for several years i assumed that this or that would wake people up.  instead they despise the "woke". they don't want to wake up.  they want to bury in. wanting a past that was only beneficial to people that looked like they do and believed like they do. 

his organization in NY has just been found guilty of tax fraud. i'm sure they will simply look the other way and exclaim "witch hunt" another favorite for anytime anyone on the right has done anything wrong. ignore facts and crimes and evidence and just claim it's all a witch hunt. 

they look the other way at all that happens to those who are marginalized because they fear being marginalized. 

there is nothing that will wake them up to the reality of this world they have strived for. 

finished my first 3 nights of this stretch and will head back tonight for another 2. probably should pick up thursday if picu needs me. that is where i have been the first 3 nights. 

i didn't have any isolation rooms, which was great really. 

first night was pretty busy but second ones were manageable. will see what these two nights bring

need to get the dogs walked but thought i would get a little blog tossed in. 

Monday walks are going well.  the coffee after and the walks both.  nice to have that social event back up and running. 

i have been doing the 12 hour intermittent fasting. it's not the 16 hour fast that most do but i am a snacker and going 12 hours has been enough of a sacrifice. i made it 0200-1400 on the days i work and 22:30-10:30 on my days off. i will allow myself broth or tea,clear liquids if i am getting really hungry. it is helpful cutting out snacks and the work breakfasts i had been getting used to. 

i already find that i don't finish as much even when i do eat. i think mentally i tell myself each time i am hungry my stomach is shrinking in size so i can't eat as much. bull but if i can trick my brain i'm good with that.  i'd be happy just dropping 15-25 pounds. would be good for my joints i think and overall health.  would like to get back in the pool.  

i got an app and it's just 10 min exercises...enough to remind me to keep going because those are proof how out of shape i am.  i am not ready to be that old and out of shape. i still have lots of hikes and paddles in me i hope but it would be better to age with as much fitness as i can. 

i also bought some bands for that kind of a work out at home, i have some free weights.  weight training is always good and i have done it off and on over the years. 

woke up the other day thinking about rape.  not sure why. just finding it odd that there are these categories of rape really. 

i had a date rape years ago.  you take comfort that it wasn't a stranger duct tape/violent sort of rape. that there are categories of rape is appalling really. 

most rapes do not get reported. i certainly did not report mine. we had dated and had just broken up. we had a boat trip planned so we just followed through with that. the thing that bothers me is that aside from whispering stop and trying to push the guy off of me, we, as females are taught to not make a scene. please all future females....make the scene. there were people nearby, i could have yelled and that would have surely ended it. the question i will always ask myself is why didn't i?

i am not blaming myself, just find it curious that we do not always do what we think we would do.  

i often just figure my poor self esteem was a factor.  i am not sure i believed i deserved a response or reaction.  part of that goes back to other experiences. it all builds up on itself. 

i'd been assaulted as i slept one time. woke to being groped by a teen that wasn't supposed to be at the house i was at. it was hell getting anyone to respond in the wee hours of the night when my friend and i called various people looking for support.  

later my own mother encouraged me to let it go.  that we didn't want to make trouble for these fellow ward members as they had enough on their plate with their drug addicted son. the message was clearly that i didn't matter that much. what happened to me didn't matter that much. i have often wondered if that lack of reaction had an impact on my lack of reaction at the date rape. 

it is better to have a date rape than a stranger rape with violence. there is a difference. at the same time being married to your rapist and getting raped over and over with no way to really protect yourself has its own damage. 

all of these rapes/assaults destroy self esteem, destroy a sense of safety. 

they are far too common though. not spoken of. we are made to feel it is our shame, our burden to carry the weight of our attacks. 

the perpetrators just carry on with their lives, completely without burden or guilt or even acknowledgement. as if our bodies are just their play grounds. 

no idea why i started to have those thoughts in the middle of the night. i think like most trauma's/stresses, our bodies release things little by little as we are mature/healed enough to deal with it. 

it's time to start planning the summer.  hoping for the trip, it will be Yakutat.  maybe in June? we shall see. there is so much out there and never enough time really. 

hoping that each year we move further from the effects of covid though and back to more fun and frolic. 

that is how my week is going. 

there used to be old mile markers like this on the Denali Highway when i first started to drive it.  they seem to have all disappeared now. 

snuggle time. always lots of that around these parts. my pets are a big support in my life. a constant. 

when you are single and live alone you will often have these fur friends/family to help with the emotional burdens that come with life. i'd say they are very helpful in that. 

fall walks.  

still some mushroom pictures...always. 

beach, sunsets...it's all amazing.  each season brings it's own beauty. 

a few pictures of Tusker to enjoy as well. his blanket is on the bed. 

life is about perspective.  just change the angle and you will see things so differently. 

sadly, many will only ever want to see the world from their own perspective so they will never see anything other than their view. 

it's a loss for them really. 

i've learned so much from others and how the world looks through their eyes. it's easier to stay in your lane so you have to force yourself into the world others experience. sometimes that is first hand, it can be through books, movies, documentaries, travel.  so many options.  

always shocking how many can go to other parts of the world or watch things or read things and still be able to only view it through their small lens. how is that possible?

seems like you really have to work hard to live inside your own box like that. there really is so much out there to help you really see others, so if you are still cowering in your own box it's your will that keeps you there. 

it's easy to want to make excuses for people but we are responsible for our own perspectives in this world.  for who we love and who we hate.  for who we accept and who we reject. 

Jesus apparently said love one another, judge not, do unto others....that message is so lost on so many of his supposed followers. 

more from the road down to Homer.

and a little kitty love.  better hit those trails before it gets too late. 

grateful for A. all the ups and downs that brought me here. B. fresh snow C. nights that i have no isolation patients.