Alaska....no gym membership required.

 

after a little float down the Kenai River. i had never done this. always fun to get visitors and add a few things to my list to see and do. we had a great trek that week.  the memories will be in my heart and bring me joy for years to come i'm sure. 

this week has been digging out of a big snow dump.  it was the heaviest snow i think i've ever had to shovel.  we got about 16-18 inches.  big ruts, the roads, even plowed, are choppy and washboard like. 

i came home from work on that last morning and had to step into the deep snow on the driveway.  i ended up saving the digging for after i woke up.  i admit to feeling a bit defeated as i attempted to dig out. it was so heavy.  i was stressing it would be too much for me.  looking for some neighbor kids to dig it out. 

my attached neighbors came to the rescue. they helped get me dug out and once they arrived the work just got easier. sometimes we all just need a little help. they also came with a tool or two. one was an ice chopper. you just slam it down and break up, well that day it wasn't even ice it was just thick solid snow. the driveway was all lumpy so it's a bit more even now. yesterday the plows came and so i had the berm to clear off. today....i rescued the Element. 

i stopped by home depot and bought myself an ice chopper tool. the sun and sunset yesterday were beautiful.  hit the dog park the last two days. also just spent hours outside with the dogs tossing ball, shoveling snow. 

i am sure i have burned plenty of calories this week. 

this is the place we stayed at in Homer.  super cute and comfy. it was a great fit for our group. 

heart seaweed. 

work was ER-Pcu- ER, ER/PICU then PICU. not sure how i ended up in ER that 4th night.  there were picu holds in the ER. i finally contacted the picu charge and told her that i was just doing holds, she could probably snag me if they needed to. she did. that didn't actually happen until after 5 am by the time i gave report. that was also the night our computers were down for 5 hours...so i came up to picu and the computers came back. so i was doing catch up charting on 4 patients in the Er and a new patient in the picu.  i still got out on time. thankfully LS did my admission stuff and everyone helped me out. 

felt bad turning over my ER patient load to a nurse who is, well....not the most proficient. what can you do. 

i had been able to go home a few hours earlier from holds in the ER the week before. that was great. 

today i braved North Bivouac.  it was pretty post holy.  i should have opted for snow shoes. maybe tomorrow. 

don't see any takers for Monday walks again. 

Halloween was fun, as usual.  most of it is cleared out.  not the Skelly's yet though.  

halfway through my stretch off already. my next stretch is a 3 on , 1 off, 3 on stretch.  not looking forward to that.  a co-worker was begging me so i gave in.  supposedly she will bring me back some chocolate covered macademia nuts from her trip to Hawaii, they wouldn't just give her the time off.  the younger nurses would have just called out sick, guilt free....and probably never heard a thing about it.  people in my group, or around there. we had an overly ambitious work ethic drilled into us.  i like the new kids moxie at times. life is to be lived and as long as you aren't calling out all the time to play, some times it just has to be done. 

on our walk to Grewich Glacier. i know i spelled that wrong.  it was a pretty day and i think everyone enjoyed that trek. well, i got a lovely blister from my rubber boots. never fun.  i trudged along though. never occurred to me that with so many Moms there was for sure a bandaid amongst them

that one loaded twice for some reason. 

walk on the spit and some swing time

napping otter. someone got a photo the other day of an otter eating an octopus. who knew

ended up with 3 babies in the PICU the other night.  it was an incredibly poopy night, lol. in adults we call them code browns, each baby took a turn overflowing their diapers through the night.  it was so gross, in one case i accidently flicked the diaper and poop came flying at my head. on my break i grabbed some shampoo and did a wash.  couldn't wait to get home for a more efficient wash.  it's a joy being a nurse some moments. 

i've also managed to get breast milk in my eye. i was filling a feeding bag above my head and it splashed. you just never know what grossness you may encounter. just another day at work

got some shaving done on Sunny Boy today. a little bit on Ivy Rose as well.  they both seem to get a bit jealous and want their Mom time. she kept coming over with the tennis ball so i trimmed her face a bit.

watched a program about a family's experience with the tsunami in Thailand the day after Christmas in 2004.  they all survived somehow.  the two little kids climbed trees and the Dad found them. the Mom and older son got washed further inland and the Mom got beat up pretty badly. they were able to see each other in the water and saved a toddler they found once they hit the end of the hell ride.  some locals eventually found them and dragged the Mom to their village, put her on an old door and drove her to a small  hospital.  she came close to death but then they all got reunited and flown to  Singapore for further treatment before heading home. 

the only strange bit was the end...where they didn't put in some facts/details about those who passed away in the tsunami or were forever lost. most movies/shows about actual events, generally say something about the loss of others and those details. 

joints a bit achy in the evenings after all the shoveling so ibuprofen and re-watched the "Queens Gambit".  i enjoyed that the first time so i watched it again.  you always seem to catch stuff the second run through.  great sleep all week. 

just though i'd toss in a blog 

i'll probably continue pulling back from several members in the family.  they are happy being Mormon and i'm happy not being Mormon.  i told someone recently that in truth, it probably would have been better to have just been shunned or disowned. all the pain up front over the false hope i had for some family that is just not possible.  they haven't really noticed that i have backed away anyway.  they never did call me, it was 95% all me, these relationships,  so i'm not missed at all. 

expectations are a bitch. better to just release them and move down the path. not sure if that is what happened with my Mom and her brothers. they both left the church as adults. i don't think they were ever close though, but who knows. 

people are there for different aspects of life some times. some stay, some go. better to not force it with anyone.  if they want out, go. 

starting to feel that about the Monday walks.  better to not force it.  perhaps it's just run it's course? i have never liked feeling like i'm begging people to be around me.  the people who want to be in your life, find a way.  those who don't, they slip away. it can be tough to not take it personally, but generally it isn't personal. people just have different things going on.  you are not their priority.

that in no way means that i will not pick up a phone or do the basics if those things happen. i don't see any more family reunions in my future. it's too stressful trying to fit in some place you don't belong.  they are better off without me and trying to make me fit in where i don't belong.  they prefer all that church stuff that i don't want any part of...so let them have it. 

sadly, church was always the winner over family, always odd since they claim to be "family first". i always knew it was family first, after the church.  people make the choices that make them the happiest. so be happy.  

part of me hoped they'd see things the way i did. that isn't going to happen. it would be way more painful for them if they did at this stage of life than it was for me going through so much earlier. 

most people stick with what they know, what is familiar as long as it doesn't cause them too much pain. for some, even if it does cause them pain. it's the easier path really.  i didn't take the easier path.....as was said, i took the road less traveled.  it worked for me.  it doesn't work for all though.  

so you just have to keep on taking the path that brings you happiness.  

and let others take theirs...

a few wildflowers from the summer.  always love the flowers...hell, i love all the unique and tiny things of this earth.  

my nieces were impressed that i knew the names of so many things in nature. i do hope they learn to look at all the things around them and discover the names and such about them.  such a gift it would be to pass on to their kids. 

some of these are Eklutna and some are Reflection Lake

either way, beautiful. 

better for crash for the night. 

thankful for:A. help from my neighbors. B that i was able to help get 2 people unstuck...you get help and you give help. C.  the companionship of dogs.  where would i be without the pets? it would probably not be good.