tomorrow...

 

is the day...i did end up getting an appointment for the vaccine. 

i'm somewhat anxious and relieved at the same time. does feel a bit like the beginning of the end.  a sign of hope. 

these are from Valdez.  would love to head out on a little adventure.  we are at the max darkness. it's solstice.  i love winter solstice as it means the return of the sun, little by little. so it did seem fitting to get the vaccine on solstice as it is a bit symbolic of the return of the light as well. 

there is still a long ways to go of course.  there is still much unknown about this vaccine as far as how long the effects will protect us.  hoping it just gets us over the hump enough that we can start to harness some control over this.  that people who believe in science and facts will return to power and they will be incentivized to actually tackle this virus.  

not much has happened in this current ridiculous administration but denial, lies and corruption.  they have continued with their lies that Biden hasn't actually won.  Trump has threatened to stay in power no matter what...like we are some third world nation and this is how things are done...there is anxiety that the GOP will find a way to pull off their little hijack of our nation and it's way of governing.  they are really taking a wrecking ball to the Republican Party and the Constitution from what i can see. 

some have left the GOP, abandoned it really....will there be enough calmer heads, rational/fact believers to bring us out of this corrupt mess.

the next big event is Jan 6 when it is made official in the congress that Biden has the electoral college votes...there are those in the trump GOP who plan to try to use this day to sabotage and take over...there are those who are well armed even who are intent on violence and protests i understand...i suspect this will be a rather small contingency and that most Republicans do not actually have the stomach to wage a take over of our government and in truth believe these reports are just more media madness....fake news.  they really do not see the radicalization of those on their own side because it's just not shown to them...unless they are deeply into those web sites that are promoting it all. 

i had my three nights at work.  holds the first night in the ER.  our numbers of covid seem to be slightly decreased this week.  i suspect that this is the post Thanksgiving/Pre-Christmas lull. i'm not saying we have hardly any patients just that it doesn't feel as packed as it did. 

holds was a bit frustrating as the charge that night is fairly new and tends to just not communicate what is happening. she just would transfer patients back to me and not include me in the plan at all.  one patient she transferred back she hadn't even informed the nurse who was caring for the patient of the transfer so i'm not getting report and i came to find out it was because the nurse had no idea the patient had even been moved. this is not safe.  

i actually did confront her in the morning.  reminded her that i actually have to take off the orders for all these patients i get and depending on the patients that can  be few orders or a crap ton of orders..that night there were a lot of orders. i also have to do full assessments and documentation on these patients. 

that night i had 8 admits to deal with.  if you are a nurse and have ever worked a floor...you will understand that a nurse getting 2 admits in a 12 hour shift can find that stressful and busy...the most admits i've had in one night in the ER hold area is 13-15 i think. it can be so insane. 

the night went pretty fast. 

the next night i actually ended up back in the Er but as a sitter.  usually a gig for techs.  i think 3 nurses from float had been assigned to be sitters.  a few years ago they had committed to no more nurses as sitters...it's pretty expensive.  i figured the lawsuits from patients that had falls probably makes it worth it...but anyway. they had changed.  none of us figured it would last very long. it didn't.  first they said that nurses could be sitters in the ER and then only for suicidal patients, then just the ER and then eventually it seems we are just back to being sitters.  

even though they test negative for covid you are in very close contact for 12 hours.  i moved with my patient up to the floor, it was a floor with predominantly covid positive patients. they have also had covid + patients with sitters. i'm not sure how that has worked.  that seems very high risk. 

he kept me busy. always funny when i do this as other staff tend to see me being a sitter and make comments about me being one of the nurses in the hospital and that it seems silly to have me sitting.  always cracks me up.  i like a little compliment as much as anyone and when you are single you will take any compliment as they are few in life really.  

when i first came to float pool i think i was a bit miffed at the sitter thing...but in truth its good money for usually fairly easy work. i have minimal charting requirements and also minimal responsibility.  it's a great break. in nursing there is actually no job that is beneath you, especially in the hospital. you just get used to dealing with all sorts of human crap.  perhaps since i started out as a veterinarian tech you just get used to dealing with all sorts of gross and disgusting things.  nurses and medical persons just learn to make light of gross situations. 

we laugh at the crazy, ridiculous, gross things.  the drug addicts that go ama only to picked up by the police and brought back. the name calling, the people swinging at you, kicking at you, blaming you for all sorts of things that you have nothing to do with.  if you don't find a way to laugh you would go nuts. 

i take it from all sorts at work....in my personal life. i have no desire to put up with any bull though. 

the message...i've not responded but i have also opted to not pretend it didn't happen.  i don't think you get to leave a nasty/hate filled message and then pretend nothing happened.  got a Christmas card, no mention. that isn't love and it isn't kindness and i don't believe love is accepting hate and being a punching bag. i get paid to do that to a certain extent at work but nope...not in my day to day life. 

especially not now i think. Covid has made things more clear in life.  who matters, who wants to matter.  the circle is small but it's at least clear. 

it's made it a bit easier to make a break from those who really have no interest in being invested in you as a human.  if they can't summon up the most basic concern then it's just time to step away even more. 

it's time to focus on the people who see you, who appreciate you...who actually care about you and show concern for you. 

my third night was in PCU...well the section of PCU that has now been made into a makeshift IMCU since the real IMCU has been shifted over to covid.  the section of the PCU i was at the night before as a sitter has also been converted to mostly covid. 

it was a crazy and exhausting night.  i started with two and quickly gained a third patient from another section of the PCU.  our section was heavy on alcoholics and the many health issues that go with that. 

after a bit i moved both of my first two patients over to the other sections of regular PCU.  then i got a patient from the ER. that patient wasn't putting out urine and had low bp's so as i was dealing with that i got another patient from the ER.  this was after 5 am...it was a rapid flip. i got word, got report, told the tech and then the patient was there...unfortunately we hadn't had time to look at the room...there was no bed there so we had to put the guy in a chair and wait for the bed to arrive.  settled that patient in and was calling the Dr and ultimately transferring my other guy over to the unit so they could start drips to help his blood pressure. in the end i had only two patients left....got out a few minutes early but clocked out no break since i'd had no break all night. 

loved all the gull action in these shots.  crazy birds really

these are at the hatchery at high tide which can really be a wild time. the sea lions,  birds and seals are looking for free food. i've never seen bears there but they do come around fairly regular. i just haven't been there when bears have shown up. there are lots of signs to be aware of the bears so i know it does happen. 

woke up today with major knots in my neck/shoulders and a pretty good headache with nausea going.  took awhile to get that under control. 

more headaches with work lately. probably a combo of wearing masks and shields all night.  not drinking enough water since you are wearing the masks. added stress.  no doubt eating crap on the fly...or just not eating enough.

it's been snowing a lot this stretch so between shift walks have been more just snow shoveling and throwing the tennis ball for the dogs.  they seem happy to just be outside playing and chasing. 

i guess a shipment of vaccines to Ketchikan ended up having some time not at the proper temperature so that was lost.  that is a bummer.  vaccines are also making their way to various villages, which has to be quite the procedure.  many thanks to all who are involved in transporting this vaccine in the battle against covid. 

from sea lions to moose...these are a few from this fall at Powerline Pass. this big guy was quite impressive

the covid aid bill passed one hurtle. it's been months in the process, mostly moscow mitch has blocked the progress.  he is very powerful and i say very corrupt and cruel as well.  he's more interested in getting conservative judges placed than in helping our citizens or in protecting our constitution.  i do hope the fraud and money corruption tactics are eventually rooted out and those that have been taking advantage of their positions of power are made to pay for it all and shamed for who they have become. 

moscow mitch did finally say publicly that Biden is the president elect and it's time to move forward.  of course, trump and company have not come to that conclusion and many on the left would love to see his ass dragged out of the white house in cuffs. i'd love to see him dragged out in a straight jacket.  at this point it's gonna have to be the conservatives that created this mess who drag him out and are held to account.  trump always showed us all exactly who he was...it is these fools who opted to play with fire and use his chaos and corruption to their advantage. nothing comes for free..they have sold their souls to the devil as it were.  they will have to pay for that in ways that are not quite clear. i've always figured that a rash of suicides may be coming once these people really see how much they have compromised and for whom. 

Christmas is very low expectation day at this end. i just have a few days off, the vaccine is no doubt my biggest and best gift this year.  i just haven't been able to get excited about it all.  i have done some minimal decorations and sent out cards and some smallish gifts this year i guess.  

a merry covid christmas is also a reminder of how overblown the holiday has become. what crazy expectations we have all been taught to have and how much it's been about stuff over substance. 

here is my little tree.  

the rest are current shots from the latest walks and snow shoveling duties.

after the plows come there are these little chunks of snow/ice. great for stacking.

of course the snow fell shortly after and by the time i came out to head to work the snow had made it look like i hadn't shoveled at all.

this sweet little face.  

tusker will be a bit bummed at the returning light.  he loves his laser time and lighter days will mean less laser light time.

LS joined me on a pre-work walk. 

our schedules have been off.  she has done at least one day of vaccination of co-workers. she does vaccine clinics around town all the time.  would love it if she were working the vaccines as i know she'd make it as pain free as possible. i tend to get soreness in the area of the injection and mild crappy symptoms with any vaccine. it's really just your body's immune system doing it's job. 

word is the Iditarod will start and finish in Willow with minimal village interaction to protect them from covid.  so no Nome finish.  could be fun if i'm off to see some teams finish at this end.  they may limit the numbers but there is usually places up trail so you aren't too crowded

Covid Cat has been quite interested in the sink and the water this week.  silly kitty

guess i will go and double check my vaccine time and perhaps organize some Christmas gifts. not really done shopping but oh well.  perhaps i should bake...no time though.

thankful for a. the lessons of a pandemic...anything bad will still bring some good  b. for the opportunity to get a vaccine and feel like there is an end in sight.  C.  solstice...the shortest and darkest days will soon be behind us and the light will begin to slowly return.