just one night off...no point switching my schedule...

 

the holidays are fast approaching and the rush of it all feels like it is starting to become the usual losing battle.  these are mostly from Girdwood and Portage.  never made it up Portage Pass this summer. the knee took me off of many of my more usual treks. 

still seemed to find things to entertain and enjoy myself. 

now the winter has fully embraced us all. we have been in subzero temps for several days, warming into single digits before descending back below zero. 

i love the peace and quiet of winter though.  it forces you to slow down a bit. the darkness and the cold temperatures regulate our lives to some degree. i don't take big road trips because what is the point making a long drive only to be in the dark in another place. soon it will be solstice and the light will start to return...as soon as that starts happening the excitement returns with each added 5 minutes of light each day. 

for now i enjoy the short days. the late sunrises and early sunsets. the long shadows. 

the rocks have been great between shifts.  they get me up and out of the house and out to the park for the hunt.  some days i'm rewarded more than others in the rocks, but always i am rewarding by the walking and the beauty. 

i only have the one day off because of Thanksgiving. i will work the night before Thanksgiving and then be off. no plans at this time other than sleeping and walking the dogs.  these days, as a singleton, holidays are really no different than non-holiday days.  i've been learning that this is the best approach. they really are just another day.  the days of my life in general are pretty rewarding even if quite simple. 

i'm a fan of simple.  more and more. my life is far less complicated than others.  it's less regimented. 

my main goal in each day is the walk with the dogs.  seeing and enjoying beautiful places, taking a few photo's to share. 

this was a trek to Byers Cabin this summer. we got a bit silly.  silly is good. 

this week i worked a night of holds in the ER.  it was nice because in the end i went home 2 hours early.  they had lots of help so they took over the 2 patients i had left as holds.  

i think covid numbers are slightly up in the hospital again.  we shall see what the holidays bring us. overall the vent numbers are still not as high as they were previously.  the goal is to find ways to keep less of these patients in hospital.  someone was telling me of one patient who refused to believe he had covid and insisted on leaving despite the fact that his sats were in the 60's or something like that.  who knows what happened.  people refusing treatments that have helped while insisting they get treatments that are only recommended by conspiracy theory sorts and youtube video's.  it's so nuts.  who would have ever believed the level of stupidity out there. 

the big lesson is how easy it is to manipulate people, stupid at baseline or not.  we believe what we want to believe no matter what facts are being plainly shown to us. all we can do is hope we are believing facts that are actually factual and not "facts" that are actually bull. 

night two was in the CTICU. patients were all pleasant.  night went well. i got called sugar and sweetie all night. there are worse things i guess...and i know because i'm sure i've been called them all at some point. 

my last night was in PCU.  we had no tech in our section so i only had 3 patients and my partner had 2.  we were each others techs.  the girl i worked with was very nice and we had a lively conversation between cares.

today, i headed out to a few favorite winter spots.  Oceanview Bluff Park has a great sledding hill....it seemed a bit too packed down now but there were a few sledders out there. the marshy trail can be slow to freeze but it was frozen.  so we were able to walk out.  you just never know what cool/strange ice conditions you will find out there. i have found some amazing photo ops out there. other times it's just a sheer ice and barely walkable. 

today it was mostly packed snow.  we could walk a ways out.  

after that i decided to head over to another favorite place as the sun was about to set. 

so we zipped over to the Campbell Creek Estuary. no dogs allowed, though in the winter i see folks break that rule. i left the dogs in and ran down to the estuary.  i'd be nervous of them sliding down into the estuary on the ice.  easier to just go down myself and leave them in the car.  in the other seasons it's a birder place. 

the ice can be beautiful, especially at sunset when the colors of the sunset light it all up.  that was the case today so that was nice. i think i got some pretty photo's

i opted to stop for some Olive Garden dinner.  may go there once a year. it was good and easy.  

may see if there is a good deal on a turkey breast and put that in the crock pot when i get off work.  it can cook while i sleep and walk dogs. 

bought a little prezzie to be delivered to my brother and his family.  hope they like it...if not they can return them to Pottery Barn.  bought myself a little something there as well. 

a platter, though part of me wonders if i will ever host anyone here again.  covid has made social lives of the singletons and i suppose others much less restrictive.  you do wonder if normalcy will return.  not that i'm a big hostess anyway. social is not my best...which makes me wonder why i am buying platters...i guess there is still a hope of some normalcy and inviting friends over again.  

do feel that the Monday walk has been lost to covid.  seems more difficult to get everyone together...it did have a good run and i have many good friends.  everyone still wants to get together but it just feels like people found other things to do on Mondays. people change jobs and schools and schedules and then it just becomes more difficult. 

i have some rocks prepped to paint and some bear bread dried and ready to experiment on as a canvas.  

my to do list is still waiting for me to get to it.  flooring.  i still have some finishes to do with the stair case.  happy i did get the calendars and cards done. 

figure i'll send my brother the calendar this year.  also have ignored his texts...best to have only contact as the group messaging with all the other siblings. my friend had wisely done that in another situation....so smart!! i will use his clever idea. 

love these blue poppies. mine never grown this great.  

jury summons in December.  it's been awhile since that has come up. have only served as a jurist once in Ketchikan. i think the case lasted a few days...we all felt it could have been summed up in a few hours tops. we all entered the room to discuss guilty/not guilty...it was obvious to us all that the person was guilty.  then we felt obligated to not come out with our decision too quickly so we chilled a bit and just chatted with each other about other things. 

doing laundry as well.  did join AAA so in the next few days i need to call them and get the battery taken care of on the Element. it looks so frosty and sad parked there. 

don't tell the Element but i am loving the auto start and seat warmers in the new car these past weeks with the freezing temperatures. 

i do like having a dog car though.  so it will be good to get her back up and running. been plugging in the CR-V.  both cars have block heaters but the Element one...well the prongs of the extension cord snapped off on one cold snap and i'm not sure how that gets repaired.  hmm. 

always love all the daisies.  

well, i love all the flowers that bloom. it's a very short season but it is fun watching different ones go through their explosions. 

several years ago i added ending all my posts by listing 3 things i'm grateful for.  i was thinking since i don't always have the best self esteem perhaps i should add one thing about myself that i like or am proud of. 

perhaps i can have a top notch self esteem by the time i turn 60 or 70! 

was reading a little thing about bringing happiness back into your life...give back...i have over the years done some giving back.  before i left the church there was the occasional service item.  since then mostly my service has been directed at the animals.  volunteer zoo keeper, volunteer at a bird rescue in ketchikan.  volunteered with fish and game to help with sea otter necropsies. of course there is all the walrus/WARIS stuff, that is all volunteer. scattering somewhat artistic painted rocks. in South Dakota i always carried plastic bags on my walks and picked up trash.  much of that stopped since most dogs since required more training and attention than old Butch did. 

i think i am pretty good at being grateful for what i have though i think that is something we all should be focused on more often.  i have far more positives than negatives in this life. i've overall been very lucky or blessed, however your bent is. i have also done my share of working for things.  

my worst area is self love and accepting in myself that i am not ever going to measure up to the yard stick i tend to lay out there for myself. goals are more just my to do list....which i am not always the best at either.  

buy yourself a little something special on occasion.  i bought myself something at Pottery Barn today.  i liked my friends idea of buying herself flowers. maybe i'll see if there are any gift baskets that are calling my name. 

these are frozen places now.  need to take a drive south a bit and see what beautiful sights i can find.  

our temps look to be staying 10 or less for another week or so here. it says -11 right now. the high for tomorrow is 0F.  looking forward to that.  

other things mentioned was learning to say no...i learned that a long time ago. i recall the day.  can't remember the girls name but she was a bit of a bully and i was in second grade.  one day i got the courage to say no to her about something and nothing bad happened.  it was very eye opening day for me.  

i have several hobbies..i think for me it's getting off the phone and games and social media and taking more time to just focus on those hobbies.  one contestant on the great british baking show, when it was her turn to get the boot, she said she had learned that to increase happiness concentrate on the things that make you happy....like baking, and the happiness will come.  

it is easy to forget all those things that bring us joy and happiness and make ourselves find time in busy lives to just do them.  i think the thing they forgot on the list is to simplify your life.  cut out all the stuff and even people who do not bring joy.  if you hate your religion, leave it.  if you have misery in a relationship, walk away.  if you have a job that saps you of any job, look for a different one.  we have a short time on this earth, enjoy the time.  do not waste your time in misery.  

so one thing i like about myself. that i was brave and took some steps to leave people and places that were holding me back from being who i needed to become.  it took guts to walk away from so much and i am proud that i had the courage.  what am i grateful for...A. nice work stretches that remind me what i do enjoy about this job i do.  B. beautiful sunsets/sunrises in winter.  that last a long time and are close together. C. waking up and finding myself surrounded by my beloved pets