Friday, April 14, 2017

woke up on the wrong side of happy today...

 so i'll start my day writing and try to get back on track.  above is a heart with Blossoms ashes...did this before i headed back north from Homer.
 I've decided I'm suffering from TTSD ( Trump traumatic stress disorder).  there seems to be no treatment would be to totally shut down, another to totally disconnect from all news sources i guess.
 doesn't seem any of it is right though.  for many of us.  we watch what is going on and feel our nation is being taken down this path towards a great loss.  loss of freedom, loss of Democracy...we feel the need to do what we can to stop it. writing, calling  those who are in DC and being informed seems the very least i can do.
 forget Obama, forget HRC..i beg those who voted for this man to look at him and his time in office already and really decide if this is acceptable. if this were not a GOP member if he were a Dem or independent how would you feel about him spending all this time and money in Mar a Lago? how would you feel about him continuing to be so involved with his personal businesses and use his position to increase his wealth? how would you feel about him not releasing his taxes and being transparent?  how would you feel about him dropping very large and expensive bombs without consulting the congress with seemingly little gain in the war on terrorists?
 how would you feel knowing he is now doing away with the rules of being open about who visits the  POTUS and what is said?  how would you feel about his kids and son in law being given so much power?  how would you feel about him and the whole of his executive orders...?  i could go on and on.  i suspect this would not be tolerated.
 bombs...more bombs.  the mother of all bombs on Afghanistan yesterday.  so last week tomahawks in Syria with zero proof of who did what and really no impact except to piss off other nations.  this week the mother of all bombs at crazy cost with again unclear end results except probably to piss off nations and throw weight around.  unclear what the gain was on this bombing either.  with his current trajectory next week it will be dropping a nuclear bomb on well we can all guess.  my apologies to SKor.  not to mention the thousands of our own military who are in range and in harms way.
 dropping bombs is a lot easier than diplomacy.  iitoo is discovering how little he actual knows about history and diplomacy.  dictators skip diplomacy and instead just use might.  it can be effective in the short term but it is not a good idea in the long term.
 love to write in the sand.  messages.  do love the beach.
 got to come home early last night.  of course, that sort of meant that i got to bed by 4 am but was awake at the same time i would usually wake up had i not worked at all.
 when i got home i discovered my insulated vest was destroyed.....grr!! when they get at stuff it is so irritating but i also know it is my fault. in my rush to get ready last night after my nap i forgot that I'd taken my vest off to nap and left it sitting on the bed.  it was fair game.  bites though.
 work was overtime because it's good Friday now.  i started in the ER.  not much happening there which is wild.  then i wandered around giving breaks to techs doing sitter work.  then home.
 I'll give up on sleep after this and just hop in shower and walk dogs.  i can nap again in prep for work tonight.
 it is just an overwhelming sadness to watch your nation be run by people who are totally incompetent and uncaring.  greed is the rule and if any program helps the non-wealthy or the environment it is on the chopping block.  these ultra rich in power have zero compassion it seems.  how to watch a great nation be torn to shreds and feel so powerless?  so many are seemingly unaware or unconcerned about the potential negative consequences of the actions the current administration is taking.  it will cause so much damage and take years to attempt to reverse if that is even possible.
 our nation has quickly lost it's standing...we are being held hostage by a madman who only knows how to react, who can see nothing beyond tonight's news.  his opinions and viewpoints change within minutes and this is dramatic.
 the colors on the water and sky were just so amazing this day.

 it's calm right now.  the skies are blue, the ice is melting.
 spring is coming and the earth is turning the way it always does.  it is fragile in a way.  a big enough explosion could toss us off our axis.  i feel off my axis already.
 history is full of bad leaders and eventually after much death they are gone..sometimes someone worse replaces them, sometimes someone better.  keep hoping for the good to rise...for some signs of hope.  hoping for some brave enough to stand up against this POTUS and tell him no.

 it doesn't seem to be coming anytime soon.  they have all put party before nation...
 hate has a way of winning, at least in the short term.  will this hatred just have to play out and fizzle before in exhaustion they see what they have done to us?  will they ever see where their actions have led us?  these greedy and wealthy souls are so out of touch with the people. so used to being a force of obstruction...
 loved how the clouds and colors collided and almost looked like they were dancing.
 it is doom and gloom in my soul today that has me waking on the wrong side of happy.  it is a deep concern.  i want no part of this war mongering.  i want no part of being a nation of bullies dropping bombs on other nations because we can.  i prefer diplomacy first.  yes, IsIs is a big threat as are several other terrorists, but that immediate threat has been blown out of proportion by fear.  dropping the biggest most expensive bombs have only taken out a few lives and no doubt will increase their recruits not decrease.  i realize we can't use diplomacy with terrorists, but we can work with all the other nations to find solutions.  destroying every nation in the middle east has been totally ineffective.  there are a lot of really smart people out there...surely we can work together for better answers and better outcomes.
 but it is easier to just drop bombs...
 the collective we look like imbeciles though when that is our only response and especially when we cheer these actions.  death and destruction are not things to be cheered they are horrible examples of failure and weakness.
 this seems to be the answer in our current party rule.  will they give up this rule?  will he?  it's not clear.
 investigations continue on his and his peoples connections to Rus.  will these bear out or will they find a way to squash them.  so far he has had no checks or balances from the GOP.
 walking back to the the sunset wanes.

 the ending of another day...lives lost, lives born.

 the rest are from our morning walk before heading back.
 the pups really did love all the walking.  they stayed chill the entire drive back north.  with the snow and bad weather there really weren't great spots to stop and let them zip around.
 they seemed content after their weekend of fun though.
 wrestling.  happy i have two overall.  it's been good for them.

 i think this was my first attempt.  the pups would run over whatever i was trying. haha.

 another few nights of work.  that place can fill up and empty out pretty fast some days.
 the ER has been doing some remodeling.  nice to have lots of work spaces and computers.
 i better get my day started.  pups are chilling for the moment.

 my dogs are forever in my heart.  it is what it is.  silly to some no doubt.  i have no kids.  my dogs are my family.  dogs are just happy to see you, loyal and non judgmental.  they are free from political opinions and carefree.  they have a zest for life and exploration.  it's all so new and exciting for them, every day.
 i may be a freak, an odd ball, an introvert, weird...all of it, but the dogs don't care.  they see the good in me.  even when i have my bad moments or bad mornings...they let me have that moment and forgive me my weaknesses.
 i shall hit the trails soon and within a mile i will be more on the right side of happy.  i can't control the final outcomes...if nuclear war starts next week...i am powerless to prevent it.  those that are will have to live with themselves in the future or die like the rest of us.  ultimately you can only control your little world...
 but i think it's still important to make those efforts to impact those who hold the what ever way you can.  if you don't even try how could you live with yourself later?
grateful for  A.  that i have a voice and that i am not afraid to use it.  B.  standing up not sitting down  C.  dogs...they are there when all that you fight for goes unheard.

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