should be packing and planning...

 how to spend my time off.  always the question.  have the cabin for Sunday and Monday night.  not sure exactly who all is coming but looks like i have some takers so that will be fun.  debating if i should plan on spending a night elsewhere the night before and the night after.

 could drive a bit of the Denali Highway.  won't hit peak color of fall but could catch some at least.

 these are mostly from the hike on Root Glacier up in Kennicott this summer, earlier.  not as much adventures it seems this year...but always when i look back at the pictures of the summer i had plenty of fun times.  it's never enough up here.  there is just so much to see and do.

 ashes from the pups grace the glacier now, they will eventually settle in tiny pools like below and slowly make their journey with the glacier.  seems pretty cool.  you can all disperse my ashes one day out on a glacier so that i can take that great adventure as well. ashes to ashes, ice to dust....eventually the ashes become part of a valley that supports plants and wildlife...can't be a bad way to end.

 never been too big on ending up in a box in the ground.  fine for others i guess, but i guess I'd rather avoid some archeologist digging up my remains generations from now.  not that this would actually happen but it seems we are always digging up someone and it's weird...respect i guess.

 three more nights, all in the ICU.  screaming last night. little old ladies.  sometimes they can be loud!! i started singing louder than she was screaming and eventually i think i won her over.  haha.

 every night as i drive to work i say a little prayer.  i ask for patience and to do no harm among other things.  i had one patient all three nights, my second patient changed a bit...same last week.  I'm not used to being in the same place every night or having the same patients repeatedly.  life in the float pool.

 not looking forward to all the busy work i have coming up next month...always other stuff I'd rather do..like nothing.  haha.

 sitting in places like this is the kind of nothing you get used to enjoying.

 feeling very detached from my family of late.  living closer some days would be nice, but i lived closer before and realized that it was more lonely living closer and having more expectations of what family is.  everyone grows up and gets lives of their own. i get that. i think i miss what we had as kids.  it drove me nuts some days, but we were always there for each other and with each other.  you grow up and that seems to just go away.

 i do not regret choices or experiences.  my life has been full and rich the way it has gone.  i remember many saying people get more conservative as they get older, but it's been the opposite for me.  i get more liberal.  I'm not party affiliated, but i have never been much of a joiner.

 i suspect being a nurse has impacted me greatly as well.  you are around people from every walk of life.  you have an intimacy as a nurse that others will never have with those who wander these streets with us.  the ones that most people just pass, perhaps nod or smile. I'm with those people, bathing them, wiping their arses, talking to them, listening to them.   every ones body functions the same.  everyone has the same emotions and fears as a rule. we all have the same hopes as well.  we are born and we all deserve to have the same opportunities.  life isn't fair but i feel we should strive to make it as fair as possible.  at least those first 20 years.  i feel the better we treat everyone the better we are as a whole.

 our nation is so angry right now, so divided. blame is everywhere.  the iitoo has zero ability to lead,  he is running this nation just for his rabid base.  to them, he can do no wrong.  they hate the media, they hate liberals.  I've seen troll posts of people saying they prefer supremacists and that ilk to liberals...so that is where we are in this nation.

 we are terrible because we'd rather see tax dollars go to build up all rather than to build a wall.

 violence is up everywhere.  here as well.  there are some really horrible folks out there...i meet them to in my work and their victims.  my little life bubble is burst continuously.  i see the others all the time.  it's so easy i think for so many to never really see the humans that exist around them.  the ones they just nod at, barely acknowledge.  they are there though.  you can make them to be horrible but the truth is often much more complicated.

 there are so many experiences that many must overcome and frankly many just aren't capable.  i always remember that scripture about God never giving people more than they can handle.  it's a load of crap i can tell you that.  people are given more than they can handle all the time.  this is why we have suicide and alcoholics and drug addicts...addicts in general.  they can't handle the difficulties of life so they turn to these things to try and handle it...but it's not handling it.

 they destroy more and dig themselves in deeper.

 addiction hits everyone in many ways.  screens are proving to be the latest addiction.  people can't or won't walk away. their lives are negatively impacted.  they screw up relationships, lose jobs.

 alcohol/drugs are more obvious addictions.  easy to see the negative effects of these addictions.  screens though....it's become a culturally accepted addiction.  our iitoo is clearly addicted to screens.  the founding fathers had no way of seeing this coming.  this man spent his career careening on the edge of legal.  getting away with whatever he could to his own advantage. I'm sure many would see this as savvy.  i think of all those who were left screwed over by this behavior.  the longer he is in this position the more he pushes to see what he can get away with.  every week the GOP does little to nothing...

 the party members in general have such hatred for liberals and the progressive agenda and Obama....they look away at what a total putz the man is.  legal/illegal, who cares as long as he pushes their agenda.  ethical..?  who cares....moral? who cares...

 my local paper filed bankruptcy.  they are currently being run by others who are looking to buy them out i guess.  the printed word is having a hard time competing with headlines.  amazing how many people don't actually read stuff but instead just like it and share it based on a headline and a quick skim of the material.

 i still have great vision.  just got that checked today.

 met with my friend KR and her 7 month old puppy Ginger after for a walk.  it's been rainy but except a few sprinkles here and there we had a lovely walk.  no moose sightings today.

 the trail is on the moraine here, headed back to town.

 yesterday i hit the dog park. the day before i slept like a rock until nearly 3pm.

 still coughing.  coughing a lot more again after being at work all these days. so dry there and talking all night.  takes time to heal.  it gets frustrating though. sick of coughing.

 tomorrow i will pack the car up and make a decision.  could head off as far as i can get and then cross the Denali Highway on Sunday and crash in cabin that evening.

 love that crossing so that is tempting.  hopeful i don't end up meeting any bears in campgrounds.  eek!

 mudslides in Sierra Leone killed nearly 1000.  that is crazy.  big storm in Texas this week.  the news always blows these storms up so hard to know how bad it will really be.  hopefully, everyone weathers it ok though.  i guess the big concern is for the amount of rain that will fall quickly and cause flooding.

 our fair has begun.  of course, that will mean some traffic if i head north tomorrow...

 did some online shopping tonight.  can't wear my favorite body shop scents during the summers due to bears but i should have a shipment on order to get me through the winter.

 bye glacier....

 hello Moraine!  it really is massive

 the pups would have loved running around here, but i would have been scared of them dropping into a crevasse.

 no paddling this summer.  may have to make up for that with a few paddles in Iceland next summer...or will i spend all my money on my kitchen remodel.  when to do it?  really need to make some appointments and do some more research so i can get on it.  will be so great to have that done though.  I'll have a functional and lit up kitchen.  it's the hell getting there that delays me from getting started. baby steps.  right?

 toilet...well that is a memory there. haha.

 back in town with the mining buildings of the past...after the walk, lunch and then a mine tour.

 we went up into the strange building seen below.  we walked up and around and then started at the top and worked our way down tiny steep staircases to the ground floor.

 should take some of these papers to the cabin for fire starting fuel. plenty of paper...and the shredded paper...that would be a great thing to take for fire starter.

 a grey whale was killed when it wandered up a river up north.  these are protected and this wasn't supposed to have happened.  not sure what the end result will be and i suspect the meat has been dispersed already, probably much consumed.  in our current administration not sure how much these rules will matter over the next few years.

 he did his first pardon today...no surprise as to who it was, he had announced it in one of the cult meetings...i mean campaign rally.  the white supreme get another sign from this administration that he is with them.

 mail box slots.

 views from the top i believe.

 kindness of strangers...recently a woman traveling with her husband on a cruise ship got ill.  i guess they had been kind of stuck in AK as she is so ill and is dying.  she wanted to get home so she could pass at home in Maryland, but medivac's are expensive.  a call went out and donations flooded in....she is now home with her family and can pass peacefully when her time comes.  we get loads of tourists that get ill up here.  some never make it home.  we also get workers on board those ships who never make it home.  it gets pretty complicated.

death is not always convenient.

 a few more from Round Island as well.  such cute walrus.

 well, can't be bothered with too much of the insane news that has cropped up today.  each day is a new hell in this nation.  do yearn for a day when more politicians work for all the people in their state and not just the ones that vote for them.  a day when the GOP admits that things aren't going so well with this iitoo and does more than toss a few words out to bring this to an end.  come on investigations...help!

thankful for: a....laughter among my nursing friends...its how we all survive  b....diversity  c.  a deep sleep...I'm ready