Wednesday, December 5, 2012

 so another day in the deep freeze.  tough to get motivated at these lower temperatures.   went back and forth about where to walk and whether to take both dogs.  rio has small cracks in her pads and i couldn't find her old booties, they aren't very good she stayed home on the couch.  i got no complaints from her on this.
 blossom and i went to campbell airstrip trails.  we probably just walked a few miles.  we both walked enough yesterday and it was well below zero.
 we took the creek trail back.  i got my macro out and put it in black and white.  those pictures are coming up later in post.
 feeling melancholy it me or is it just the blue skies and cold air.  ready for clouds and snow.
 my hair got all tangled in the frost, my camera strap got tangled in the frozen hair and froze...lots of freezing. hair appointment next week...chop or not to chop.  we shall see.  i'm ready to attempt to be attractive to some much as a woman near 50 can be.
 the creek trail is a newer discovery.  always fun to see the changes in the flow of the river week to week.  it's mostly all frozen up except for a few holes where you can hear the water rushing beneath.
 it's beautiful.
 reading a book that i started on the kindle quite awhile back.  it's sort of an annoying book in that this family, of a preacher, are being tormented by someone in their congregation they believe.  it's nasty notes, calls, then also bombs bursting near their homes.  they have 2 small children and yet they stay in this situation.  pretty ridiculous and i think it will get even worse before it gets better.  i get on reading streaks and then a book like this stops me up. love to get sucked into books i love.  sucky books though, can really take the read out of me for a time.
 finally made it to the museum today.  can't say i was as excited as it seems i should have been.  driving over i was wondering if i really should bother today.  didn't take me long to get through this exhibit.  strange, a little disturbing i guess. not really sure if the people who donated their bodies were aware they would be traveling like this.  probably more fascinating for people not in medicine.
i get creeped out in museums often anyway. for some reason i must look like i am there to tamper with or steal the exhibit as the gaurds seem to follow me around waiting for me to err.  some other poor folks were told not to touch the glass.  really. the glass just needs to be cleaned...they shouldn't be made to feel like 4 year olds in a glass factory.  so i counter my irritation at the guards by breaking the rules and snapping a photo...i am a child..i know.  it's so annoying though and it always seems to ruin my museum experience that these people follow you around.  it's totally creepy.  i'm on the paranoid side anyway.  was in growing up in a big city, getting attacked a few times, though minor it still impacts you.  how can you enjoy the exhibit with some guy following you and watching you.
even in the gift store my activities were monitored as if i have slippery fingers and was set on stealing something.  on the plus side, some folks were kind and gave me a quarter so i could stash my coat and stuff in the locker.  you have to put in a quarter which is then returned to you.  seems silly to me.
 thought i would try the frost in black and white.  i do think it's better this way and may have to experiment a bit more with this until the snow returns.  i attempted to bring a black background, i tried to slide it underneath, but as soon as i let go, it slipped under the little footbridge.  haha.  it was easily recoverable, but obviously not as effective as i'd hoped.
 there were some large leaf sized frost out there.  very cool.
 it's fun shooting black and white.
 it just puts me in a different mode, photo wise.
 my photo moods come and go.  when i am in photo mode it's really fun. other times i can tell i'm more in picture mode and walk and snap more.
 these were taken over the next bridge, looking down on the various ice formations.

 thought they were pretty.

 the other day at kaladi's an annoying comment was made.  i let it slide, but here on the blog..i can address annoying comments without being annoying myself.  well, i may still be annoying, but there is just a small percentage of the free world that will actually read enough to know how annoying i really can be.  right?
 the fact that i do not have children does not mean that i can never have anything valid to add to a converstion about rearing children.  people without kids may be able to observe what those with the kids are too close to see.  i have 24 nieces and nephews, began babysitting at the age of 10, work with kids and so i believe i'm as qualified to give advice as the next guy.  does that mean i have the same qualifications or information as a 24/7 parent, no.  of course, one must note that the supernanny makes a living giving advice to parents...and i don't believe she has any children of her own.  just saying.  i don't have to have all the diseases my patients have to treat them, i don't have to take the medicine i give to others to know the effects.  you get my drift.
 chatted with the checkout lady at walmart for a minute.  we were talking about how cold it was and how many kids come strolling in to the store without a hat, gloves and even a coat!  she told me some man brought a 2 day old baby in there.  she thought that seemed a bit silly.  i also know that one shouldn't leave a child home alone and travel abroad, no matter how mature that kid seems to you. thinking of this recent serial killer...predators like that are always looking for a situation just like that.  frightening.   i also know that if you are having trouble with your kid lying, asking them to withhold truth from the other parent is probably not going to bring home the point.
 some people just wish to discount your advice and saying you never had a kid is an easy way to do that.
 loved the light out in this part beyond the second bridge.
 blossom is again happy to  be chasing her tennis ball.
 frost does work with the black and white.
 i like that the blue goes away.

 trees bathed in the sunshine of afternoon.
 i was prepared to do the museum then hit westchester lagoon for a kicksled.  i had to reheat though for a bit before going out again so i read and rested and that put me all off schedule.
 creekside views.

 have been coughing for a few  hours, hope that doesn't mean i'm coming down with something. tons of folks been sick out there i guess.

 have the netflix movie "the whistleblower" ready to go.  it's about sex-trafficking in post war bosnia.  i'm sure that will help me sleep better tonight.
 the only other person i saw out there today was a jogger.  people still commute by bike in these cold temperatures.  they are way stronger people than i am.
 one of the few open places.

 this once was a bit of a waterfall...totally frozen. was kinda wondering if that 5.8 quake we had the other day put some new cracks out there.

 the frost is always thicker along the water routes.

 i know i'm an overposter.  it's what i do.  i just enjoy looking back at all the's become my photo album in life.
 some days i feel the melancholy and i know looking through photo's always reminds me of the good life i have.
 it can get frustrating for me some days.  seems like i'm always the one making the call, or the text. if i don't, nobody else will.  i don't really think this means nobody wants to hang with me, but it would sure be nice if people would think to call me or text me or ask me.  i suspect that is the way it is in life . there are those who plan the stuff and those who just go along. some days i just want to not be the planner for it all.   it would be nice to feel like i am invited for once, that i'm wanted.
 when i had troubles with a co-worker once a friend i was walking with said, "if one person hates you and mostly everyone else likes you, she is probably the bitch, but if only one person likes you and everyone else hates you...well, then you may be the bitch".  she assured me at the time that i wasn't the bitch.
 some days i wonder...have i become the bitch that nobody likes?  i hope not.  i think in general i am liked well enough, it's just that people don't see me in a "we should invite her" way.  no doubt in some ways i've kept people back for so long that as happened in that movie, "the doctor"...i need to let my arms down and let people come to me.  fear is a powerful emotion and it's easy to allow it in to your life.   it's best to just relax and let life happen though, accept that you are lovable in your own way and that people who look at you and really try to see you will see your worth.
it's just after 9 and i'm ready to curl up for the night.  will watch my movie and read that book...hope it gets better.

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