Monday, November 17, 2014

 pictures not loading as well again today.  may have some doubles in here...but seeing extra Blossom's isn't so terrible.
 not sure that my melancholy improved today but i think this evening i feel a bit improved.
 nobody joined me on the Monday walk so i walked alone with Blossom....again, thank heavens...for little dogs!!  we did have some coffee folks again so that is always nice.  KP stayed late and chatted which really helped.  also spoke tonight with gnat who always seems to understand the situation.
 it's not a fixable thing.    i don't really think my life needs repairing.  life is what it is.  i am open to changes, i put forth certain efforts, but as you get to a certain age there aren't quick fixes when it comes to those bigger relationships.  it's not the same as when you were 16 and had boy troubles or wanted to go meet people.  things such as dating and making friends gets more complicated as you get older.  those are the facts.
 some days those facts roll over you and you feel the melancholy, then the reality of your life rolls over you again and you realize all that you do have and forget the things you don't have. it's just that time of year...mixed with a bit of the grass seems greener on the other side...of course, this time of year the grass isn't green anywhere.
 since i was alone i just put on my big girl cleats and headed to these pond/lake things in the middle of the North Bivouac trail system.  this would actually be a great place to come watch the lights.  i'm sure the city lights would impact them some but you would be amazed how good the lights can be right in town on the right night.  mostly i just like to watch them.
 someone had been out here skating it looked like. this year is optimal for skating and kicksledding.  wish i had my sled out there today.  it was super pretty out there.  the ice was smooth as beautiful.  hard to hold your melancholy for long when you walk in beautiful places such as i walked today.
 lots of cool bubbles to check out and reflections and i even liked the plant matter that had blown in and made cool formations.
 life moves forward.  our Senator spot has changed hands.  my heart sinks at the idea that our new senator would like to get rid of the endangered species really just explains a lot about him as a person and i find it frightening.  i fear for our states wildlife and our states lands with this person in office...what were my fellow Alaskan's thinking?  at least the governor will be changing hands as well, not sure that this will be of any improvement but in this case change is best i think.  at least there is hope of some different decisions.
 hard to hold to tightly to your melancholy when you look at the news and see that yet another person was beheaded at the hands of IS.  my problems are trivial in the big picture and i can move through my issues.  my heart goes out to this man and his family. there are some horrible people in this world.  that, in itself, is enough to cause depression in all.
 the light and colors were pretty sweet out there today.  i was actually losing track of time.
 always takes some time for me to get brave on the ice.  the silly thing is i do better when it has a layer of snow on's probably better to be able to see how thick it is frozen and the snow cover would seem to hide that.  oh well..sensibility is over rated. just like i tend to prefer the small planes over the jumbo jets despite the facts that the small ones crash more often.
 see the cool designs with the plant bits. not sure if current or wind did this.  they are pretty frozen into the ice though.
 the reflections are just awesome...hard to tell that this is frozen water, but it is.
 it clouded up before the sun set again. i could see a bit of color in the distance as i drove from coffee and headed to deposit some donations into out WARIS account.  not too much though.
 i have a few appointments tomorrow so my day will probably be a bit busy with that stuff.  will try to walk dogs between.
 me...on the ice.
 Rio almost joined us today but opted out at the last minute.  with glare ice like this i think i'd rather her not be out there.  too much risk to her joints. i tried to keep Blossom from getting to wild out there.  thankfully there was plenty of trail before/after these ponds for her to chase her toy and get that out of her system.
 there are two ponds out there so i wandered around the outskirts of both.
 i try to be pretty cautious when i'm alone...i could easily fall and whack my head out there....or really take out my knee. no word yet.
 pacman ice formation
 the bubbles came in lines.
 it is always beautiful out here and totally unaccessible all summer...too boggy and too buggy.
 so i enjoyed being able to get out there and explore for the first time this season.
 Blossom was much more adventurous on the ice.  she has little fear...she's not keen on horses.
 the ice was good in that it made me focus...kept my mind from wandering and over thinking life too much...which i tend to do.
 the girl was happy.  will probably turn in early tonight in order to get myself moving quicker tomorrow.
 enjoyed a photo session with my girl out there.  she just makes the scenery look so much nicer.

 different layers of freeze, leaves and twigs encased until the spring thaw.
 where is my perfect out there!! would be cool to head out there on a full moon night with headlights and kicksled/skates.
 Blossom sits with the bubbles.

 lines of bubbles next to the plant matter.
 bubbles and skate marks i think.
 more bubbles.
 see, think less and just post pictures of lovely scenery, bubbles and puppies.
 watched, "the ultimate gift" last night.  mostly a good movie.  a bit simplified i guess, but it never hurts to be reminded of the good gifts this life brings.
 don't think they mention food or a good dog so obviously incomplete.  what were the, education, friends, family, money?  surely i missed something.
 don't think Blossom wanted to leave the ice..
 as i tried to head off up the trail she stayed on the i ended up coming back and we circled the ice again.  what's wrong with spoiling her and giving her what she wants some times.
 hopefully i haven't doubled up on too many photo's or missed some cool ones. Blogger has it's issues from time to time.  overall, it's worked pretty well.
 there i am...selfie.

 another day in the life of me.  one can't expect every day to bring you absolute joy and one must be willing to suffer through sad days in order to appreciate the happy ones.  far more of my days are filled with happiness and contentment than sadness.
 sadness is part of the human experience as is imperfection. i am far from perfect and long ago gave up attempting to attain perfection.  it's over rated.  so many seem to put it out there that all in their lives are perfect, which is generally a facade as nobody has perfect lives.  sadly that facade can feel real to people and make them feel badly about their own imperfections.  it would be a far better world if we were all just a bit more honest about it all.  we all can be weak at times, we all can have moments when we need....shouldn't we be watching out for each other rather than constantly tearing each other down?
 cruised by stumphenge on my way back to my car.  i was a bit late for coffee but i suspect it was mentally a good thing for me.
thankful for's for today... A.  that trails i walk often can still surprise me with how different and unique they look on any given day. B.  friends and family, well meaning and good intentioned.  they may not always say the right words or be able to swoop down and change the world, but kindness always helps and is greatly appreciated.  C.  green grass....there is some below and it's on my side.

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