with over 20 years in this amazing place. it's never dull. i hope to enjoy years of exploration here.
Sunday, October 7, 2012
a lazy, rainy day....bliss in brainlessness!!
i did get the dogs around the bog, no moose sightings. it stopped raining in the evening but i did very little but veg out all day. cookies are made so i guess that is something. the dogs and cats seemed happy to oblige this lazy day. the dogs aren't big fans of rain either and the walk around the bog was slow.
this is how rio spends most of her life anyway. couching it. what a life! i printed out the first few pages of the book that i had begun working on and am charging up the old computer that i may just use as a typewriter, purchased a little over the bed/couch laptop table for making me comfy and cozy for writing. at least that is the plan. read back the first pages i wrote and i really think it would be a good book....all that remains to be seen is if i can make myself commit and get it done. i'm capable, for sure, just have to make a few goals for this winter and make it happen. goal #1...book, goal #2 improve my exercise routine, goal #3....well lets not get all crazy!
i need to toss in an old favorite movie that inspires me to go forth without concern of outcome. "leaving normal". life is better if you just move forward and don't have too many expectations. fear will derail you at every turn if you allow it to. i used to wonder why i left the religion of my youth when a few other siblings seemed like they were unhappy there as well, but not leaving. in the end i just had to accept that perhaps i was braver, perhaps i just was able to get past the fear of what may happen if i left. what did happen was that i became a happier person. religion is personal, even within any organization it should be something that the individual can make work for them. i don't believe in the church i grew up in, but i accept that it works for others. some people like having that connection to an organization, some like the social aspects of it, some just feel it's a fine place to raise their families and some just believe. i didn't believe, i didn't have faith, i didn't like the history and the plan for the future. i left, nobody even asked why. too often the questions i asked were answered with dribble. "there are things we just won't understand until we are dead" "the church is true, the people are not", "just get married and have kids and it will all be okay". for me it was a strong enough religion that i had to either be in or out. i'm not someone who can sorta believe, i felt like a hypocrite. the social didn't work for me either. then again...social anywhere doesn't work for me. my social, my religion is in the woods, the beach, the water, the trees and the animals.
often it's easy to just stay with what is comfortable. right now for me that may just be the life i have, it's comfortable, peaceful...writing could shake things up. life is better when you shake things up, it can get scary, but i know from experience that change brings growth. i may be stagnating and that is never good. besides, i have something to say. other people say stuff all the time and most of it is crap, why not my crap being out there! i'll try and keep you posted on whether i write or an lazy! now i'm just writing about writing so that doesn't count. haha! had to quit the movie last night by the way. i got too stressed worrying about those monks.
have lived in alaska since 1995, lived in ketchikan for 6 years and here in anchorage since 2001. it's a wonderful place and i enjoy getting out nearly daily for a walk/hike/stroll or ramble. enjoy the pics