Tuesday, January 12, 2010

full day of outdoor activities...

funny that i added pictures of trees today. i'm watching "speak". a favorite flick of mine. her assignment in art class is trees. she is a victim of a sexual assault and the movie deals with the aftermath of such an event. the angst that the victim suffers, the isolation...
one in four females have had some sort of sexual assault. victims are all around us and yet it's rarely really discussed.
me...lets see there was the time the man pulled over in his car next to me to "ask directions" when i was around 15. he was jerking off. the times i've been flashed, front and back, i've lost count of that one. i was house sitting for some fellow church members when their son snuck into the room i was sleeping in and felt me up. date rape with an ex boyfriend. he broke up with me but apparently he still thought that was acceptable.
it's not so much the act of the assault the worst is the lack of reaction from people who should react. the feeling that you should just keep your mouth shut as the parents of said boy are already dealing with enough...we go to church with them so lets just pretend none of it happened and keep everything nice and pretty. the rape...the guilt of knowing i could have easily stopped it, but i kept quiet so as not to cause a scene...not to cause an embarrassing and awkward situation. it's what you do.
makes me think of women across the globe the indignities and assaults they have suffered. do i have trust issues, yes. it probably didn't help that i had self esteem issues. i think those who commit these acts can deduce who the vulnerable ones are. i'm not vulnerable anymore....i learned to speak. the girl in the movie finds her voice too. that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger. i am stronger now, more confident. does that make me safe....no...even old ladies get raped out there in this world. when you see the horrors that happen to people on this earth you can put things in perspective. you can move on from events in your life and find your peace. the girl in her movie used her art to help her move forward...i used poetry. haven't written for some time. i should i guess, but i no longer am in the hole . i found a safe passage home.

life is good at this end. today was a great day. i woke late and got the dogs to the bog. then i settled rio in with her peanut butter and television and took blossom to campbell airstrip trails. we did rovers run. just a nice day out there. not as chilly as yesterday. has snowed a bit off and on this evening. the snow looked so nice that i through the ski's on after we'd walked rovers run and did about 45 minutes of skiing. blossom is tired. no toys tonight.

blossom on the bridge and resting with her beloved tennis ball. such a cutie. oh...i forgot the toilet flooding incident this morning. that wasn't a pleasant part of the day. took several towels to clean up that mess. seems to be working well now. but i'm suspicious of the thing....waiting the next event.

love the picture below of the tree...not sure why. sometimes you just get lucky with a shot. i picked up the pictures i blew up and tried to find frames for them. i bought some but when i got them home the matting thing i bought made them impossible to fit. so i guess i'll have to return those later this week. i like the mats i bought though. also my calendars arrived from shutterfly. came out decent. not bad for a first attempt. i'm sure i'll get better next year. i figured i'd send them off to a few friends and siblings. i have a few spares so not sure what to do with those yet.

guess i'll settle in with the latest book and get to bed before 2am...my goal for the week. such lofty aspirations i know.


  1. i would have wept through the whole movie. i think you're right about women everywhere having had some sort of experience like sexual predators are everywhere below the radar. it has a lot to do w/ how we raise boys too.

  2. I want a calendar if you've got extras!! Blossom is so dang cute.

  3. i cry everytime i watch that movie. i'm sure it has much to do with how we raise boys, i think societys attitudes toward women play a huge role. so it also has much to do with how we raise girls. it's sad to see so many young girls sexualize themselves...their value seems so wrapped up in how the boys feel about them and not who they are.
    shannon...i'll get a calendar off to you. i have to buy some envelopes to put them in...

  4. Thanks, Betsy! I'm excited! And I totally agree about how sad it is that so many girls sexualize themselves. It definitely has to do with how we raise BOTH sexes, and it's definitely a subject I have very strong opinions on.